"visitation" with my 2 girls

Thanks for the support.

For the first 2 months they begged me to come and stay (and did).  We had a great time.  It changed when I wanted to take them to a college football game on my weekend.  They were excited till they heard their mom yell at me over the phone about her not wanting them to go.  The 4 year old (from that moment on) has had a hard time.  Sometimes she wants to come sometimes she don't.  The last time they were with me, they both wanted to stay an extra night.  I texted her (# form of communication with her) and of course she simply said "no".  I told the girls that their mother missed them and needed them at home, not that she just said no.  They cried and told me A LOT...that night.  For example, I instructed my 8 year old to read more...she said when she got a book and began to read "mom wanted to know why I was reading.."... she told her cause Dad said I needed to...she said mom wanted to know "why you don't read for me".... she said her mom asks her why she writes neat for me ...and not her (when I do her homework with her).  It seems their mood/attitude changes when she spends time with them at her mothers (my mother in law).  I do think this is all weighing on them and their decisions... I just want what is best for them and for them not to hurt.  If it was best for me to stay away from them in order for them to not hurt and have a great life... while it would kill me.. I would do it.

How is your stbx? Do you think that she would be trying to turn the girls against you? It happens more than we all know and it is totally wrong. If that be the case then you need to get some proof. It should state in your agreement that neither can denigrate the other in the presence of the kids. If that is what she is doing then I would take her back to court. It is SO sad to have a dad who WANTS to be a part of his kids lives and the mom tries to stop it. Take it from me- I was widowed when my kids were young. They have basically had NO male influence and it shows. It breaks my heart. I WISH I had a good male influence for my boys- But as I told my brother last night- It is better to have no male influence than a crappy one!
See if you can talk to them and find out why they didn't want to come. Then go from there.

Sounds like maybe the stbx may have something to do with it. Make sure you have a good lawyer, something sounds fishy.

Wow, PKD...That's a tough one.  I'm afraid I don't have a frame of reference, but I'm sure there are others here who will help.

Hang in there, buddy.  We're here for you.