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  Posted to group - Legal Answers    <<Previous    Next>>

I could really use some advice, asap.

I have been married for approx. 10 years. I have only lived with my wife for the first 2 of those years. We basically never talk to each other, we have since had other relationships and have been going on about our  lives as if we were just another girlfriend boyfriend break up.

I am now in a very serious relationship and I want to get married- soon. As soon as possible actually I would like to propose on christmas. The only problem is that I am freaking married. We got married in new york. She still lives in new york and i live in pennsylvania. the divorce would be uncontested and we have children or property together. We havent lived together in 8 years like i said. basically, i just need to get out of this legal marriage to her. Can someone more intelligent and law savy please please tell me what to do? I know it sounds desparate but i am. I have asked her to go to the court house in new york where we were married and file but she is lazy and just doesnt. i am unsure if i can file in pa. i am having a hard time finding a lawyer i can afford and none of them will give me any answers.

do i have to file in new york or can i file in pa?

will it be expensive if it is uncontested, no kids, no property?

can someone PLEASE help me, i just want to get on with my real life.


by Jaysin   2 Posts 
Posted on 11/24/2008 2:26 PM
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Answers for "I could really use some advice, asap."  (6) (You must be logged in to answer)




If it really is uncontested you can certainly file in PA.  You would have the appropriate forms drawn up, filed, served on her in NY, and be divorced relatively quickly.

In fact, if you could convince her to come to PA and visit with you at the Courthouse you could get it all done in one day under a 3301(d) no fault divorce.
by Axel   5 Posts
Posted on 12/4/2008 4:05 PM
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Ok here's the thing - you have NO RIGHT to call your wife lazy if for the past 8 years you haven't bothered to get a divorce either...BOTH of you are lazy..now you just have reason and want to place the burden on her, why should she? You want it, you do the legwork & filing.

Yes, you can file in PA - since there is no property or kids you can download the forms from your local court site and fill them out yourself. (depending on the county) so start there first. Or check out any of the do it yourself divorce site online. Google "PA do it yourself divorce"
by spaznskitz   4949 Posts
Posted on 12/1/2008 6:24 PM
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well thanks for the help I will definately check out the laws. as for marrying early, i have been separated from my wife for 8 years and been with my current girlfriend for almost 2, so i don't feel like I'm rushing. Thanks again, i appreciate the support.
by Jaysin   2 Posts
Posted on 11/24/2008 5:38 PM
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i don't know the answer either, sorry. but there is a white box on this page with all the states divorce laws. i would read those and find out what your states rules are.  i know NY has some strict rules about time limits, etc.  it should be an easy matter if you're both in agreement.

as for the rush.  i get you want to propose in december, but does that mean you want to marry very quickly?  you're just going to have to get this divorce taken care of first, obviously.

i wish i could help more.
by paula1   6988 Posts
Posted on 11/24/2008 2:29 PM
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come in there spaz....you always do!
by sweetrose   43 Posts
Posted on 11/24/2008 2:29 PM
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I'm sure Spaz can help you in a heartbeat, Jaysin.  She's our resident lawyer, and is terrific.
by 2much42long   1236 Posts
Posted on 11/24/2008 2:28 PM
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