Thoughts on Getting over it? Not by a long shot

What makes it so hard to move on is the effect it has on my daughters. They suffer from the divorce, no matter how they try to be happy it always invades their heart every time they see me and their mom together. I don't know if I will ever stop being disgusted by my ex and her cheating, not just on me but our family. She does not think she did anything wrong, she thinks her happiness was and still is paramount to anyones needs, including her children.

Yeah I have to agree that it's hard to move on when you are still hanging out there in limbo, with regards to fighting about support and getting the house sold.  I've had my house for sale since January of this year and nothing has happened becuz let's face it the market sucks right now.  And I really feel that I could get over a big part of him walking out if I could just get this house sold find another place to move into with my boys and start over and start fresh!!  Hell he didn't have a problem walking out and starting a new life with the bitch, so I'm ready to do that here and now!!  I was ready months ago, clear back in February when we had our first offer and he wouldn't accept the offer becuz it was too low!!  Well guess what we recently went back to court (I took him back on contempt charges) and the court lowered the price of the home--and the price that it is now is ALOT lower than what he would have accepted from that offer back in February--bet he could kick himself in the ass now for not taking that offer!!! :)  Oh well sucks to be him!! :)  Hang in there and stay strong!!

Thank you for your kind posts.  I am trying to move on I really am, but then we all backslide sometimes.  I do go to therapy and she's a super woman who always confronts me when I do things - like looking up the OW's divorce document, or wanting to contact her ex.  I don't think I will be able to move on until this is over - house sold etc,  We are fighting over support - he says I deserve nothing because I lived off of him for 22 years while I stayed home with the kids.  I make 1/4 of what he makes - so I will like in substandard housing if I take what he is offering.  Anyway -- Thanks again for the good suggestions and kind words.  I needed to feel that someone understood.

If he cheated on you, what is the purpose for hanging on? Yes, we all take time to heal but you are making it worse for yourself. Let him go...he isnt worth it anyway. You will be fine but you need to start worrying about yourself and your happiness and let the cheater go. A year from now, you will look back at this and wonder why you obsessed for so long. To me, what he did was the ulitmate betrayal. You can do better.

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Definately, a cheating spouse is the worse betrayel.  Especailly after so many years invested with him.  I was married 26 years and it still hurts if I think to much on how fast he walked away from our family. But both you and I know we will heal, but it will take time.  I will never have any form of respect for my stbx (lower case because he doesn't deserve uppper case letters). And to be any woman or girl that breaks a marriage will never be anything but a family wrecking slut.

I'm sorry you are going thru this and let me say I know what you are going thru.  I was married 17 yrs and my ex cheated on me with a co-worker (aka the tramp) and it hurt like hell, becuz you feel so betrayed and then everyone, that hasn't gone thru this before, tells you that you need to move on and get over it!!  Yeah okay let someone take your heart out of your chest and stomp all over it and then tell me how it feels.  Everyone heals differently and I read once that for every 4 yrs you were married it takes 1-2 yrs to recover and heal.  I hope that's not the case, some heal faster than others, but I hope to heal a hell of alot faster than that!!  You both had a past together and it's hard to let go so quickly of all of that and I can't blame you.  Yeah I have to admit I looked the bitch's divorce record up on the computer becuz she walked out on her two kids to go live with my ex (aka the loser), and who knows why--but I don't call her a mother I call her a mother F****R, but that's neither here nor there...anyways I digress....yeah I looked her record up on the computer and I also from time to time for shits and giggles look up and see if they have filed for a marriage license yet becuz he told my boys--you will have to get used to her becuz I'm gonna marry her one day--yeah like he knows what marriage is all of a sudden.  Too funny!!  It sucks going thru this emotional rollar coaster ride, but time will heal all wounds, and I also like to say that this too will pass!!  I also like the saying--that KARMA is a bitch and I love her becuz karma is already working on my ex --YIPPEE!! :)  So hang in there and you need to focus on you and heal at your own speed don't let anyone tell you how long it should take you to heal...only you know that answer!!  Good luck to you!! :)