2-2-3 Visitation

Man, I wish I had the chance to do this.  My ex took our kids with her to her hometown 12 hours away from me.  I have a hard time getting there to see them because of the distance but I talk to them everyday. 

Sounds like a great deal but I can see the drawbacks of having so much contact with the ex.

Good luck.

We are aiming for a everyother week rotation. However, I think its going to work out with me dropping off in the morning and him picking up in the afternoon. They will most likely sleep in my home every night which I am beginning to feel is important so they have some normalcy.  And we will rotate every weekend. I think the kids will like something like this as they are very attached to both of us and would like to see both parents everyday if possible. This is definitley going to require a lot of teamwork and for us to live close. We are ready to handle that for the kids, even though we may still have our problems. I am just hoping that she doesn't want to move her OM in too soon, as my ex is doing with his OW. Idiot.

I agree that split custody is really hard on the kids.  They need stability now more than ever, especially if one parent was the primary caregiver before.  It's bad enough to have your parents split, without having to move to a new home for half the time.  It amazes me that the courts think kids should adapt to stuff that most adults would never tolerate.  Would YOU want this arrangement for yourself?

If you do go with this, though, make sure the kids have a fully-equipped household in both places.  My kids have to drag their clothes back and forth every other weekend (even though my ex was told to have clothes, etc. for them at his house), they have little in the way of bedroom furniture; he himself lives like a college student, and not because of income.  They never feel at home there.  I let them take whatever they want over, even allowing them to leave a video system and things I paid for at Dad's to try to make them more comfortable. I think the courts are too concerned about parental and adult rights, and not enough about children's well-being.  Sorry if that sounds negative, but it's definitely my experience,

I have a friend who splits visitation with her ex. Her daughter stays with her a week and then with the ex for a week. It seems to work for them. They don't mind stepping in and helping each other out if work means someone else has to pick up their daughter from school. They keep everything pretty flexible. They are truly amazing on keeping the focus on their daughter.

This is just to hard on the children who did not ask to be in this mess. You need to move in down the street and come over and get them as much as you can, but let them sleep in the same bed each night and have their friends. Sorry, to rain on your idea, but as a father, I can tell you they will want to come to live with you when they get older, so save up your energy...you will need it.

If this works for both of you then that's great, you need to look into the best interests of your children right now.  They are the ones left in the middle of all this and I think it's so important to have both parents involved in the kids lives no matter what you feel about the ex, the kids deserve to have both parents in their lives to provide stability and security for them, so they know yeah mom and dad aren't going to be together anymore and don't love each other--but they DO love us and care for us still.  I hope this works out for you.  Good luck to you.

#1  it means you two have to stay super close to each other
#2  it means you have to put any and all animocities aside
#3  you have to be very mindful of how your children react as some don't fare well with such a ping pong visitation schedule.

You know your kids - think about how they are, their emotional capacities, how they handle change in their every day lives and if you think they could handle it.

This needs to be less about what you and your ex want and more about what the kids could handle.