16 Years

You know.. I feel your pain, it's really hard. My husband did this same thing to me except we have three beautiful children. It's hard but my suggestion is find things that you and your children can do that will take the negative energy that your feeling and make it into positive energy. You have to find ways to take the focus off of him and put it onto yourself and your children. It's and old saying "Space grows the heart founder" Give him his space if that's what he wants. It's only a matter of time before he realizes what it is that he have and that if he does not get his act right he will loose.

As the days go on, I'm beginning to think a divorce is what's best at this point. He still maintains his innocence, but I'm not that stupid to believe it's just a friendship. I just hate to think after all this time I have to start over and deal with all the stuff people dish out. Lucky enough I haave a great group of friends to help support me during this time. I had to see him over the Christmas holidays so that was stressful, but I managed!!!!

I know it's hard. But you will get over it! Time heals everything. I had the same case: ever since we got married my husband has been refusing to make love to me. We've been together almost 2 years now - making love max - 1 time in 3 - 4 months and I just found out that he's cheating on me! And he has been since the very beginning. So, if your husband is refusing to make love to you, then ........ sorry...... but probably he is thinking of making it to smb else. And it's up to you whether to try to save your marriage or go for divorce. But what it looks like from your words - it's better for you just to divorce.

Firecracker's right. Everybody is different, and what you can deal with, somebody else may not. It sounds like your husband should consider seeing a professional on his own too. It sounds like he's got some things that need working out. Still, you have to be strong for you and your kids. Take firecracker's advice, talk to somebody, ti'll help clear your head and show you what you need to do.

Only you can answer that. I can say that i have found talking to someone helpful (be it a priest, therapist, etc.) it helped me organize my thoughts and realize what i wanted out of life - and who i wanted to share it with....