Emotionally Lost

It's been 9 months since i've posted anything...In those 9 months I've tryed to keep my family together with no help or effort from my husband..We've had are good & bad days..but as we all know we can only make that desicion to finally get out ..I've been verbally, let alone emotionally abused long enough..We had a fight last nite that finally made me say to myself why I'm I putting my self and my 4 kids through this any longer..I'm 42 years old and I know this is wrong it's that courage we all need to finally say enough is enough I told him enough is enough I'm going to my lawyer on Friday to finally free myself from this man who I loved & actually feel sorry for , he needs help and dosent want to get it...I've read so many self help books, it's me who needs to help myself and kids..I've been a good wife, mother & everything else that come's with the family life.... I actually had surgery on my hand last week & he actually has the nerve to tell me to quit milking the situation, my stiches are still in for another week...He has dinner on the table everynite, cloths washed but NOT folded the house picked up & he has the nerve to call me a B----. I will show him what a real B---- can be...I told him I will give him the easist divorce there is I just want to be happy..It's the kids I worry about but they have heard and seen enough & I'm the only one who can protect them..So as I take the next step I will need all the support I can get...Life is to short to live like this..