Im new to this....

Sorry to hear about your situation.  Welcome, look around the place their is so much good advice and positive energy here.  Keep posting and asking questions, I have gotten so much better and I have been here a very short time.  Keep yourself physically healthy not only for the kids but for yourself.  This stuff is difficult enough but to be pregnant also I cannot even fathom the additional stress.  Be well.

I feel to blame because as I said before, we were separated once, and I decided to take him back.  So basically I feel as though I should have known, but instead I let him come back to me and hurt me again.

Welcome Lyndzi!  That's actually normal.  We throw blame at ourselves and at the other person.  I know I felt like I should have done something to save our marriage, but couldn't find the thing to do.

Why do you feel like you're to blame?

Hi,

I'm new to this site as well as to this whole idea of a possible divorce. My husband is severly depressed. He's in therapy - we started going to a counseling together, but now he's going alone to our therapist. That was fine with me as due to his issues I didn't feel we could get much out of couples therapy anyway, at this point at least.  He's been out of work since the end of 5/08 and even prior to that changed jobs many times and has lost his job once before. The counselor believes he's been depressed since he was very young.  He's a good person and tries to be a good dad. We have 3 small children. I work full-time but don't make enough for all of our bills. We've already borrowed $$ from my parents and his parents don't seem to want to offer and he won't ask so now we've maxed out our line of credit for our house - UGH. We were already way in CC debt before this started. Blah, blah, blah.  Anyway, it's so ugly at home that I would kind of like to ask him to leave for awhile. Of course, we don't have any $$ so he'll have to ask his parents if he can move in or something. Does anyone have any suggestions? Does anyone know if I have to support him since he's not working? He's not looking for a job right now because he doesn't know what he wants to do and apparently it's on the of the things he's working out with his therapist. Unemployment runs out in about a month.

Advice?

I apologize for being fresh out of advice right now. That's an unusual thing for me, but it happens.

Be very glad you found this site, despite my temporary lack. Blogging, asking questions, and responding to other's posts is incredibly helpful. And virtually everyone here is supportive. You may get criticism sometimes, but it is virtually always constructive. And that too is helpful.

So post a lot, nose around and make comments on other's posts, and know you are not alone.

Take care, and best of luck dealing with what life has thrown your way.

Have you tried going to counseling , it sounds like maybe he got a taste of the single life again going out with his buddy's you don't think there maybe someone else do you? Try to suggest couples counseling and see if he's willing to go, and if not still see one for yourself , it will help with all that you will/and are going to be going through if you two decide to divorce plus this site is great for advice venting etc. were all here to help , there are also a lot of advice links on how to get started and what you need to do to protect you and your children through all this , there are even some family lawyers if you have some quick question ( they have been very helpful to me) , I'm so sorry that this is happening to you sounds like your husband needs to grow up a little be, but we are here for you , Good luck ! ( V-cluesless)

well after he came back, we were doing GREAT!  Better than we had been in a couple years.  We were happy again.  I was the only one working, but times are tough, and he stayed home with our daughter.  He did finally get a job, and we worked different shifts....this is where trouble happens.  Every night after work he was going out with his buddies, and I didnt say anything at first, UNTILL he was doing it EVERY night.  So we started arguing about that, and then he decided to tell me "well, I want my freedom" and asked for a divorce.  I knew we had been fighting, but I didnt think things were THAT bad.  It's still pretty confusing to me...