dating while seperated

Thank you everyone for your advise. Yes we have an agreement he will verbally agree but not sign it. if our divorce was coming out of the blue I probably would not be ready to date but our marriage was a sham for years now and i was trapped with no way out. The final straw came when he went after the kids and when I got in between that they saw him repeatedly slam me against the wall and other things I wish I could erase from their memory. I am trying to wait I know this man will be there when my d is final, he isn't someone I just met he has been a freind for quite a while now. I am happy with being his freind it is nice to have someone who has my back and one day will be more(we have talked a lot about it). thanks again

I totally agree with the previous posts. But for those of us who just can't seem to do what's best, (like myself) I can offer layperson advice! First of all, have you signed a separation agreement? Was there anything about being free to conduct your life separately-including relationships? Although my STBX won't sign our agreement, we (my atty and I) had it written such that he could date/see anyone he wished (in exchange for his signature). We were trying to provide incentive for him to sign it. Adultery is illegal in NC, but if you are not trying to prove adultery and bring charges of AOA or criminal conversation, then you are waiving your right to proceed on that basically. The state of NC is not going to bring charges against you for committing adultery against your husband. And if your husband signed an agreement stating that the two of you could carry on your lives separately in that way, he can't easily file an adultery lawsuit. You see what I mean? Look up condonation-legal forgiveness too. That is how my attorney explained it to me. Case law, where the rubber meets the road, still seems to be the best interpretation for our state's laws on this. At the time, this applied to my cheating husband, but now that I am wanting to date, it applies to me!

Good luck!

I agree with spaz. Wait until your divorce is final. It has only been 6 months and you need a clear head to make any decisions.
If it is meant to be he will wait for you!

In that NC recognizes adultery, it's a dumb idea to do. You could end up paying for it - literally.

If you date while still married any money you spend on the dates is considered misappropriation of marital funds and your spouse is entitled to recoupment of all of those funds...to name one issue you could potentially have.

 

If there is someone you are interested in, if it is something that is meant to be, they will still be available/around when dating is allowable in your situation.