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any advice will help

ok I have been married for 20 years we have 2 kids 18 and 15 my wife just asked me for a divorce out of the blue and still has yet to tell me why it has been a month after she asked for the divorce I found out she is cheating on me with this guy I got the phone report and it said she had text him 598 times in a month and she has pic messaged him 108 in a month and she has been talking to him on her myspace a month before she even asked for the divorce i think she thinks im stupid and wont look anything up she has no idea that I know yet... do I let her know i know....what do I need to know before starting the divorce papers?is there like a check list I can print ? I live in utah....my kids know about this other guy and they both want to come with me but she is going to try to fight for full custody over the 15 year old does he have a say? and what do I need in court to prove she is cheating on me and hes not just her friend? I do have a receipt that shows she bought condoms and birth control for women out of our debt account but it does have her signature is that good enough? and i have all the phone reports a rose he bought her and a bear her got her is that enough? sorry so long PLEASE let me know... I just dont know what to do at this point oh and she wants to live with me for nine months till our lease is up on our home.

by corbin08   1 Post 
Posted on 10/14/2008 3:25 PM
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Answers for "any advice will help"  (1) (You must be logged in to answer)




Ok, let's try to get to all of your questions here....

first thing I suggest is that you start interviewing attorneys, go for free consultation and find one that you are comfortable with - especially since you know you are going to have a custody argument on your hands. I'm sure she has already done this as she has been planning her departure for a while.

Click on the tab on this site labeled "Beginning" there are a lot of resources there for you. Including checklists...

Unfortunately, your 15 year old does not have a say in where he lives. There is only one state that has laws on the books about a child's voice, and it isn't Utah. The judge may choose to hear what he has to say, but it is their discretion, and most choose to keep children out of it, and rely on parental deposition/examination and any professionals that are brought in. If she has been the kids' primary caretaker all this time, the court may choose not to change that. (status quo) Hence, why I highly suggest you don't try to do this on your own but hire a competent attorney.

 

If I were your attorney, I'd hire a private detective to watch her for a while to see what is going on. Your evidence might be enough, but it depends onthe judge you are in front of - as far as contraceptives, you can't prove they weren't for use with you so that "evidence" means nothing. Texting and myspace seem off, but it can be spun as friends - you need evidence of physical meetings.

 

If her name is on the lease she has a right to stay there until a judge orders one or the other of you out - that is something you two are going to have to work out.

by spaznskitz   4796 Posts
Posted on 10/14/2008 4:44 PM
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