violation of visitation

Your story is the main reason my fiance's situation is so upsetting.  There are so many ex wives that want their kids father in the kids life, yet the fathers refuse to make the effort.  In our situation it's the other way around...he wants nothing more than to be able to spend more time with his son.  And she is unwilling to allow more than what the court ordered.  She can't understand that the order is a guideline and that if the parents agree to it, there CAN be more time spent with the children.  With this woman it has been nothing but childish behavior.

Everything from her trying to talk to me and get me to think that my fiance is cheating on me, to filling false police reports but worst of all manipulating the system to believe that HE is the one that doesn't want to spend time with his son.  Yet every time we have been to court it was because he filed (including the divorce).  She has stalked him (and me) on numerous car forums.  If there is some event taking place on a day we have his son, she won't show for visitation and them send him BS txt messages asking him why he didn't show up.  The saddest part of this is that his son loves to be here, and has a great time with my daughter too.  And now we have a baby on the way and I feel she is going to do anything she can to prevent family bonding time...as she has in the past.

I am having this problem wtih my ex.  We have visitation set up since our divorce in March of this year, but he hasn't been following it at all.  This summer he stopped getting the boys for visitation all together because he moved in with the tramp he was cheating with.  I was told that I can't make him want to see his boys that he should want to see them instead.  So basically it's pointless for me to file contempt on him for this reason.  I was also told that it would be hard - in our court anyways- to get the shared parenting changed and get full custody of the boys unless I can prove a significant change in circumstances.  It's pretty sad that he hasn't had them for overnights since beginning of August and that's okay.  The child support is based on the shared parenting--what's shared about it when I have them 95% of the time and he only sees them now every other week for like 1 to 2 hours.  Pretty sad if you ask me!!  But oh well he will be the one who pays for it in the future when the boys want nothng to do with him anymore.  That will be their decision to make--not mine.

I know (two years later) she still has hang-ups about me.  But like it or not, this is the way the cookie crumbled.
My concern (as should be her concern) is that the child is not used as a bargaining chip.

So if there are e-mails asking her to comply and there are replies to those e-mails, would her reply be enough to show she has knowledge.  And can her replies be used to show an unwillingness to compromise and/or act in the best interest of the child?

This ties in with times when the child has been ill and there is little to no communication on her part.

Just this week the child was taken to the doct and a follow up appt was scheduled.  She informed the father the next day that the child "was feeling better" and that she was canceling the appt.  On the father's insistence (and on the condition that he pay the co-pay), she agreed to take him.  It turned out that the child has a mild pneumonia and it was discovered in conversation with the Doct that the child has been sick for weeks...All she told the father during the exchanges for visitation was that  the child had allergies.

Just today she sent an e-mail that stated the next visitation was on the 22nd of November when in fact it is on the 8th.  He replied to her telling her she was wrong and stating the correct dates.  IF she doesn't show  on the 8th, would these e-mails be enough to show it was willful.  The child has been sick but we feel it doesn't warrant her denying his weekend visitation.  He already agreed to cancel the mid week visitation because the child was taking meds and we felt a short two hour visit would not be in the best interest of the child.

He has also asked her for make up dates on the two occasions and she simply doesn't reply.
Could we use this as a way to show she is willfully not making an effort to allow the child and his father to spend time?

On top of that if he doesn't have proof of trying to find out why she was a no show, and proof of certified letters demanding that she keep with the new visitation schedule before filing for contempt he will get yelled at by the judge just as badly as she would.

this is something the two of them need to try to work out themselves first before running to the courthouse.

I'm going to hazard a bet you might be part of the reason she is refusing to follow the court order...

No, If he didn't file anything from orders previous to the new order from sept 11th, he is SOL on it..  and no, you can't file them ex parte - she has a right to be notified, respond, and be there.

FYI - two violations won't get him very far in court - it doesn't prove willful and consistent defiance...all that is going to happen is the judge will look at her and tell her to show up for visitation...so don't go into court expecting the book to be thrown at her. It won't happen.