How do single parent get by without seeing their kids everyday.

Hey fly. I know it will be tough but you have to think about the kids too! My daughter's bf 's ex has now set up a schedule for her that the poor kid is in a different home each night. She wakes up screaming in fear because she forgets where she is( she is 3). Think about your kids in this whole thing too. Share them as much as possible but try to keep them in a routine. Make the transition from home to home as easy as possible. You will still be able to attend their events but please , I know it is hard...try to think of them as you decided who gets them, when and for how long.
Switching homes every other day is too much..
Let us know how it is going...

I feel your pain. It was really hard at first not to see my kids every day. When you are used to the daily routines such as dinner, baths and bedtime stories, going without takes some getting used to. It was and still is very unsettling not to be in their daily lives. But you get used to it. You and your ex will get accustomed to the time alone. My advice is not to get caught up in the obsessive thoughts that fill your mind at 2:00am (or was that only me?). As long as you stay an active and participating father, you will always be "Dad". Make sure that you keep the lines of communication open with the ex when it comes to the kids. Keep the ex informed and hopefully they will do the same for you. Hang in there.

What will help you is making a plan for what you will be doing for when you are not with the kids.  Keep yourself busy and surround ourself with people.  The time will go by faster than you thought it would.

Luckily my kids are older and sometimes they choose to not go with Dad and he accepts that.  The first day that they left and this was only for the day, I literally thought I was going to die.  Now they are only with him on Friday nights to spend the night and a few hours during the week. 

I am now enjoying my Friday nights with the girls.  Not enjoying being on the way to a divorce, but just accepting what is happening and doing the best that I can do.  Take care and hang in there!

i am in the same boat as you too and our children are around the same age. my husband and i are seperated he has the kids mon-thurs and i have them thurs-monday morning. this has only been for two weeks and it seems like years go by when i don't see my babies. It is so hard. Its killing me but we will get through this, and its OK to cry, ALOT. I try to remember to pray. And remember God is watching out for those babies. They are blessings from Him and he will provide and take care of them.

well, you two need to make a plan.  i don't mean this as glib, i really don't, but honestly, one of the perks in this whole mess has been the every other weekend thing off.

i didn't think that would be the case in the beginning. i felt just like you. i cried and cried to anyone who would listen how i could never not be with my kids...and miss things...and how unfair this is...

but as time went on, i started looking forward to those weekends.  and now i'm practically counting down the minutes!

really, that took four years though.  i'm a tad obsessive.

but everyone i know who does this pretty much says the same...they love that time off now.

you two can work this out.  you don't have to do the traditional every other w/e thing.  i have a friend who has his kids wed - sun one week and wed-fri the other.

ideally, you should live near eachother...that makes it so much easier.

maybe you could drive them to school (when they get into daycare/prek)...she could pick up....etc.etc.etc.

daily visits in the am or pm?

Paula - Thanks.  There is no way I would settle for the weekend thing and every other wednesday that I have heard to be the case with ome couples.  F THAT!  I would not be able to spend more then 2-3 days away from my kids and I think my wife would say the same.  I just can't bear tp think about it and I know its coming...

it's not easy.  my children were 1 and 2 when i divorced.  they rarely see their dad.  they don't really remember him ever living with us.

i have begged him, and will advice you to try to keep the relationship strong by seeing them as often as possible.  usual visitations are every other weekend, but i know some dads who have the kids every weekend.  and midweek dinners and sleepovers too.

call daily. 

set up a webcam to see them when you call.

send postcards and notes and little gifts.

show up for all school functions and for no reason at all.

work with your stbx to make this the best possibl