i just read these. don't worry what people think. do what you need to do...whatever that is. just do it with open eyes. it's not going to be easier, being divorced. it may be better, but not easier. if you have kids, that means more commuting time to see them, less time with them, obviously and more dual house issues...plus less money all around. lots of issues. so think it out.

Thanks to all for your comments. I realize this is a situation-specific thing. I feel this invisible hand, call it morality, societal pressure, something, that is pushing me to stay in a marriage for the sake of keeping a stable home for the kids. I suppose this is all in my mind. Our counselor said if we divorced everyone would wonder "I wonder what happened to them?" and discuss it for 5 minutes but then move on with their day; not really caring that much. Wondering what other people will think and say is paralyzing.

It does depend on your situation, but I can say this, speaking strictly for myself. I was the primary breadwinner. We had a big house, two incomes, and two kids. Six years later, while I'm still the breadwinner, I now have a job where I make half what I did before. We rent a duplex (sold the house to clear out the joint debts.) And I'm a single parent. Sounds worse, right? Wrong. My ex and I are much better parents apart than we ever were together. My job that pays half as much also lets me flex my schedule,, work from home, and otherwise works with my life as a mom. And I'm much happier - my ex is happier, and the kids have two happy homes to live in instead of one miserably, angry one.

I've only been divorced since October and can absolutely say I am happier! I was already doing all of the raising of our children, all of the housework, cooking and working part time. My ex is an alcoholic in deep denial, has been secretly unfaithful for 6 years and claims to love me and want me back while living with the woman he has been seeing all of these years! ("She really is just a friend!") It is shocking to me how many excuses I made for his behavior over the years. Our children in the 3rd and 1st grades prefer to be with me or their dad's girlfriend over being with their dad alone! They are happy, we have a routine that is pretty much the same as before at our house- only now I work full time. Their father is busy trying to impress the girlfriend and the children each weekend with trips and fun outings all over the place. I look at it like this: The children now see a loving adult relationship (Father and girlfriend), hear much fewer heated arguments, get to go on a

Absolutely!! If you're not happy, and you've tried to make it work, its time to take the next step. I am all for whatever makes you happy. I dont believe in staying with anyone if they make you miserable.