There must be serious money in this case because otherwise both your lawyers should be telling you that neither of you has a chance at full custody. The Courts frown on anyone even asking for it unless there is a good reason like the other parent is in or going to jail for a long time. Her lawyer is simply setting you up to pay serious legal fees by provoking you to seek joint custody. If you pick the more reasonable request and the Court ultimately decides for joint custody, then you can really reduce or eliminate paying for your wife's attorney. Good luck

If you are both loving parents, there should only be a choice of Joint custody. This is my 2nd divorce. I had all three of my children with my 1st husband. He is a loving father, that will always be his best asset. His parenting skills sucked, but he does try. I never even concidered ever holding the kids from him, even if it hurt me, which it did. But, for the kids they could go back and forth between homes with no problem. we shared every other holiday, each got them a 1/2 the summer. Even though I don't like my ex as a person, we even helped each other out with driving, or train fair, what ever it took to get the kids to where they were happy. We each paid 1/2 of major things, like, braces, athletic camp. I even helped him with his new wife. He started doing the same things to her. The kids liked her, and she is good to the kids, so, I thought what the heck. He actually talked to me a lot, and took my advice. He started treating his wife like a wife instead of the maid and the "mom". They go on trips together now, and enjoy life. I wish we would have had someone to help us. But, at least the kids were happy. They feel like they have always had "2" homes, 4 very different parents, and they loved us all, and all of the parents really showed these kids love and cooperation. Yes, it was very difficult. My present husband see's no reason to keep in touch with my kids now? No remorse for all the hurt and betrayl. These kids and I looked up to him so much. We can't believe he dosen't give a shit what happens to us. I don't care how old all the people envolved are, we still have feelings. Just because a child has reached 18 dosen't mean you can rip their heart out and walk away. I don't know how old your children are, but it's all about them now. My son was 17 when this started crumbling, just like a 5yr old he is trying to blame my husband straying on himself. That's what kids do.

ok I have five kids that in this past yr. have been living in joint custody. And let me tell you it is no good when there is any kind of pain hurt or anger still involing the parents. It's sad but very true as long as that stuff and all those feelings are there, I have come to see that kids dont like living in and out of bags going back and forth. They don't know what they can get away with or what they can't from house to house. I wish you all the luck, because it dont get any easier gettin a divorce it get's harder and more stressfull in other ways. Hang in there and always think of the kids and how you would feel if you were them.

Split custody has it's positive side and it's negative. It is ideal for the kids, because they want to see both of you equally, and it can provide them with more balance in both relationships, rather then just the every other weekend visitation. The negative can be the increased interaction between you and your ex, with a split custody arrangement. With shared custody arrangements the two of you will have to put on those co-parent hats alot more then in normal visitation arragmements. This can be ideal for parents who can move past the pain of divorce, and work together to do what is best for the kids. More often then not, this is not the case. I don't know about you, but it is some 8 years since my divorce and me and my ex still argue. Parental conflict cause children great stress....sadly this I know first hand.

hopefully you and your ex can resolve this matter before court. my ex wanted 50/50 but my kids are to young(only 3 and my youngest is not yet 1).i feel as they get older they can spend more time away from home with their farther. how many children?what ages?