WHY DO MEN THINK WE ARE SO STUPID!!!

Hey Dazed, have you even gone to a free consult with a divorce attorney to know if you really will end up that bad off if you do split?

Because of your financial situation, he may not care what you think.  Would you be able to support yourself?  what about the house, kids, bills and so on?  I don't have children and I do work so I did file for divorce because I didn't like who I was becoming.  He thought I was stuck and now he has hired an attorney so he can go after anything he can get.   Men sometimes think they can control us by financial manipulation and/or abuse.  The only thing they need to do is love and respect us as equal partners in the marriage.  Unfortunately, some men want it all-the security of marriage and the freedom of being single.  I hope you manage to get out of the situation.  Don't let him beat you so far down you can't get up.

I don't think it's so much that we think you're stupid, I think that it's more that we think we're smart enough to be getting away with it...and for the record, I think that's all cheaters, men and women alike.  I think they start out cautious, but they get sloppy and careless and then, one day, you see a text or an e-mail and the cat's out of the bag.

Now, to your problem, I'm sorry you're going through this.  I know things might be tight financially, but living a lie is no way to live.  This will continue to eat away at you until you aren't you anymore.  Your kids will notice this.  Your husband MIGHT notice this, but the question is will he care?

Well, you have some decisions to make.  I wish you luck with that.

It's not that they all think we are stupid. It's that they think they are so much smarter when they're not. Hey guys I don't mean every man. Just some of them.

My ex's lies started from the begining. But he lied about things I had no way to check on and such minor childish things I would never have a reason to look twice at. And because he said it; he expected it to be believed. At the end it was like an 8 year old little boy with chocolate all over his mouth saying no I didn't take all the candy. Still expecting to be believed.

If you are going to try to stay you are going to have to learn to let the lies slide by and not get upset by them. It will drive you crazy. You have to learn to not care anymore.  If you can't do that it is going to hurt you and your kids in the long run. The hurt and anger will be there in everything you do in your life.

I was advised by two attys. to do that because my ex was sending a lot of money home. I knew I couldn't do that. I'm basically pretty honest and open. If you ask me a question you may get more info than you wanted. That's just the way I am. I knew this would hurt our grown daughter but I couldn't take it anymore and had to get out. I hate a liar with a passion and the fact that he had lied for 33 years was driving me nuts.

The decision is yours and yours alone. Just keep writing and someone on here will "talk" to you. Just keep paying the bills down and save some for yourself for a new start.

Please take care

Because most men (not all--don't get me wrong) think with their little head and not with their big head!!!  They think they can have their cake and eat it to, so to speak!!  If he is cheating and lying to you, you shouldn't let him walk all over you.  What kind of life is that for you and your kids?  Financially it's hard for me to make it because my ex makes 3 times as much as I do, but luckily I'm a saver and I get child support from him, so that helps a little!!  My feeling is I'd rather be broke and happy then well off and miserable!!  I found out my ex cheated on me and that was it!!  I didn't want to touch him anymore or even look at him because he disrespected me and our marriage.  You should think about it long and hard and try to see the pros and cons of staying married.  You can't base your marriage all on lies that's not fair to you or to your kids either.  I wish you luck!