Buying clothes for children with ex wife

I think it is a great example to your kids to do stuff together- without rancor.  Unfortunately for you current squeeze, you will have to deal with your ex for a long time now.  Weddings, graduations, special birthdays- you can't get away from those.  Show everyone you can all get along and show your current that your kids come first.  She may come to her senses in time.  If not- maybe you need to rethink that relationship.

I can see both sides...however, you had your kids before you had your new partner, and they should come first anyway. I know that her stomach is probably squirming at the thought of you "spending time" around your ex, as Kassandra said, you DO have a history together...But if this for the kids, then she shouldn't be worried. It's not like you are going to the movies or dinner w/ your ex. She needs to understand that as long as you are active in your children's lives, you are going to have to deal with your ex. That's part of co-parenting, and if your partner wants to continue her relationship w/ you, she's going to have to fix her issues and accept that fact, however unpleasant it may be for her.

Being with my fiance and having 3 children with my ex, I can see both sides.  You have a history with your ex-wife that you don't have, as of yet, with your current partner.  Imagine being with someone who has this big history with another person.  Now, granted, they clearly no longer have feelings for that person and, by all means, it probably ended badly and isn't worth worrying about, but it's the history that raises a red flag.  Especially for women, there's this whole competitive thing between us ladies that I'll never understand.  You have a history with your ex that you don't have with your partner and it puts her feeling like she's on an uneven playing field.  Now, having said that, I stll think, at the end of the day, you have to do what's in the best interest of your child and I know what it is to have an ex who spends money like it's water and I don't trust him to take my money and use it for the kids.  I buy alot of the items they need and ship it to him rather than fork over the cash and then I don't know where it's going.  Your number 1 priority, at this point, is to make sure that your children are getting your money to meet their needs and that it's properly allocated.  Now, if that means you go shopping with your ex, you go shopping with your ex.  If your partner is so insecure about you going to a mall with someone you no longer care for, then it's a much bigger issue than shopping with your ex.  It's a trust issue and that has to be dealt with before you take it any further. 

 

That's my 2 cents.

 

Kassandra

http://tinyurl.com/5ab56y

I don't see anything wrong with it either.
Shows the kids we are still adults about their care.

Its only my new partner that has the issue, and I think her view of feeling sick over the thought of my and my ex out together is something I need to talk over, afterall as you mentioned bigger issues may require both our attention as the kids get older.

i think its a great idea to do things with your ex...family related things like this (school clothes shopping) is so benign it's perfect.

maybe I should do that.
Dont have to do it together, just my ex's idea.

My partner will be pleased I should think.

 

Thanks

ok. why can't you buy the clothes next time you have the kids?  why do you have to do it together?

my new partner tells me ' but how do you think I feel you going out with your ex ' . Does this mean I needs to know how she feels? Can it only be jealousy, or does she 'feel' anything else. I just don get it, maybe cause of course... im a man. lol

 

I told her I'm metting the kids parent, not my ex. Three years since divorce, and if my ex could get away with cash then she would. I just need to ensure the money is going on the items the kids really need for school.

your kids come first....always.

i think you need to investigate why your new partner would have a problem with you taking care of your kids.

jealousy?

i can't think of one reason why anyone, partner or not, would have a problem with you helping your kids and giving your kids what they need.