Where do I begin? I filed for divorce after he physically harmed my 14 year old. My children and I moved out of the home in January - the stalking began immediately afterwards. He did not come to visit the children until months later when he thought I may be seeing someone. On 3 occasions he either took the children on a non-visitation day or refused to return them according to the court order. My ex husband is bipolar. He is on and off of his meds. I was not aware he was bipolar until a year after we married. This is not about him and I, or what he put me through but I need help for my children! There are mounds of police reports, the judge who granted the divorce warned him that day to back off or she would grant me a PPO which she did and I currently have. The judge also granted a temporary suspension of parenting time, which was already supervised by his mother, and we decided (both parties/lawyers) to have the visitation resumed at a facility. Problem now is he is going after joint custody and I would not worry about it normally however he is a very manipulative person - which the judge is already aware of. Between the hundreds of text messages as proof, phone and police records it is very evident. My concern is that the supervisors at this facility are under the impression that he has been wronged in some way and that I am the person with the questionable character. Which I am not worried about that part of it I am confident in the person that I am and my ability to provide my children with a safe, stable and loving environment. My concern is that he has manipulated them and they are recommending to the court that he does not need supervised visits and should start looking into extended weekends? In front of the supervisor tonight, we talked for a few moments and I tried to put the foot forward and say what can we do and he said he thinks I am wrong that we will get back together and once I said we need to be a family unit for the kids but that it does not involve him and I as a couple he immediately responded that the facilitators there are backing him up and that he "will not stop" until he has joint custody. Where are the rights for the kids? They are 1 and 2 years old. Aren't there laws that determine what is considered a fit and unfit parent? I am not trying to keep him from seeing the babies - although at times I wish I would have let sleeping dogs lie and not pushed him to be a part of their lives. It is a horrible thing to think and say but had I not pushed and pushed - they would not be in this situation. It is all about controlling me still - if I do it his way then things are good for the kids. If I do not comply to his way then things are not good for the kids. His way is for him and I to gte back together. Oh my gosh - can anyone help me? What are our rights? Please help me.
hate to break this to you - bi-polar - doesn't automatically put a person in the unfit to ever parent category. (think Britany Spears here)
Yes, he may have made huge mistakes in the past, but, he is jumping through all of the legal hoops he is supposed to be - and apparently, is showing he is willing to compy to orders now and that is all the court is going to be concerned with.
The fact he wants to get back together with you and is pushing for it really isn't an issue to the courts - all they care about is how he is doing as a parent - and apparently, he's satisfying his requirements.Due to this, the law is more on his side - not yours.
He more than likely won't get joint custody for a while, he still has hoops to jump through, including getting to the end of the PPO without another incident....but eventually, he will probably get unsupervised visitation, and overnights...he has a right as a father to this....how crappy your relationship with him is not a factor - it's all about how he is with the kids.
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