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Parental Alienation Syndrome- what can the kids do?

I am not divorced but my neighbors went through perhaps the most conflicted, lengthy divorce I have ever witnessed. 3 year to divorce and though it is final - the war is far from over.  They have 2 beautiful children who have been severely psycholigically harmed dring this process. Both parents have so much anger, one appears to manipulate the children against the other and communicates constantly about how terrible the other is. I think it's leading up to a 2nd custody battle. I've known the children since their births ( they're 11 and 17 now) and I have a strong bond with both of them. I've been trying to be a "neutral territory for them to talk and feel whatever they need. The older has become very protective of the younger. They need the bitterness to stop. It is confusing to them - they don't kow who they should love - which is the saddest thing in the world. The one thing they are sure of is they have to choose. Thing is - that's so wrong. I'm considering arming them with a little info about  PAS and helping them tell both their parents they can't listen to it anymore. I need your thoughts. Please help. These kids have changed so much from the confident, fun lovign kids they were 3 years ago. Thanks so much.

by Robin   1 Post
Posted on 6/11/2008 8:57 AM

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Comments for "divorce360.com | Parental Alienation Syndrome- what can the kids do?"  (4) (You must be logged in to answer)




be there friend and maybe they need some counsleing to help them thro the tough times my kids went thro the same thing and we are going thro counsling... unfortunatly there father who is my ex doesnt think there is anything wrong with them he dont see them but everyother weekend and everyother holiday and 3 weeks out of the summer. i would suggest talking to the parent but again be wary but maybe they need some counsling like i said that isnt going to hurt them it helps more than anything. good luck. some times when a person is too close to the ordeal the kids have a tendancy to clam up and hide there emotional feelings and they will act out in behavior.

by wolf712008   33 Posts
Posted on 7/9/2009 2:40 PM
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my husband is contacting my son everyday at college telling him that I am an alcoholic and my daughter who currently lives with my husband is being brainwashed to believe this also. though whenever I was drinking any alcoholic beverages he was right beside me doing the same. Though he continues to alienate me from them and they are refusing to call me.
by dbra   1 Post
Posted on 11/14/2008 10:57 AM
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Be careful. If you have a good relationship with them you can try to discuss it. There is someone on this site who wrote a book on divorced parents parenting successfully. She has raised her children as a single parent and seemed to have some wisdom.
Do some research on it. Seems the 17 yr old, if informed might be able to stand up and let them know what they are doing is wrong. It is so sad that two people who once loved each other stoop to levels of hatred and cannot see what they are doing to their kids. Wouldn't it be nice if the 17 yr old could tell them to stop, tell them if they don't then she is taking them to court???? Wonder if she could do that. I have heard of kids "divorcing" their parents???
by mtnvly   3539 Posts
Posted on 6/11/2008 12:08 PM
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if you are really close with the kids and the parents, then yes, talk to the parents. but be wary....
by paula1   12664 Posts
Posted on 6/11/2008 9:14 AM
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