Please help...What should I do?

I am so lost. I have never been in a situation like this before where I just don't know what to do. I have been with my husband for 9 years now. We were married very young and have had a really rough time going through financial problems, having a sick child, and just getting married so young. We have been through a lot and put each other through a lot. There have been so many bad things we have done to each other that I just don't know if I can get past. It's always been a mind game with him. When we first got married and I was pregnant, he would stare at everyone to make me jealous. I'm not talking just glancing at people either. He would leave and go out partying. I was never treated like really good and like I was loved. There has always been so much lying. There is honestly no trust left. I have turned to other men in the past to get what he was not giving me. And honestly, I couldn't say whether he has done that or not. It wouldn't surprise me. He's always been the type that always tells me how everyone wants him. We have been separated for 3 long weeks now. It has been so stressful and has gotten my mind so out of wack that I just feel like i know nothing anymore. He came to me telling me that he just didn't know anymore and that he would never be able to give me a 100% nor could he adore me like I needed to be adored. Then when I gave in and he kept pushing away, my feelings changed. He pushed me away so hard, that I put up a wall that I don't know if I can take down. It's like I have no feelings anymore and I don't care either way but I don't want' to make the wrong decision either. I just don't know where to go. Can anyone give me some advise?