Polls

Do I dare try again?

I recently found emails from my husband to the OW ( his coworker) whom he said he would stop communicating with, telling her how much he missed her! He works in the same building but different departments so I'm sure he sees her daily anyway
Now that I have moved in with my mother and allowed him to keep the children while I look for my own place he is asking me to not file for divorce. I am so confused as of yesterday I thought I wanted a divorce to start my healing process but why do I feel guilty about no longer being able to bring my children up in a 2 parent home, as I had always dreamed. What should I do? I have been a stay at home mom for the last 8 years and the thought of starting all over on my own is terrifying.

by lonley 16 Posts
Posted on 9/30/2009 10:40 AM

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Cast your vote

Remain separated to see if he is willing and able to change for the better
File for divorce and began the healng process immediately
Ask him to transfer to another office to avoid working with the OW and hope he doesn't continue this relationship or find another office love
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Comments for "divorce360.com | Do I dare try again?" (6) (You must be logged in to answer)

My husband also promised not to speak with the OW. Sh called while I was sitting next to him in the car and he kept saying, "hello? hello?" like no one was there when I could clearly hear a woman's voice. I was so upset I couldn't even breathe. That was in 2004 and I'm still not able to trust him.

by missaldrich540 2 Posts
Posted on 10/31/2009 3:44 PM

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I know how you feel. You want the best. You love your kids and want the best. My pry are for you to find the right answer for you.

by Sergei88 2 Posts
Posted on 9/30/2009 6:59 PM

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I went through the same thing. He made contact again and I still stayed. Things were never right though and I was constantly questioning his actions and motives until I was driving myself crazy-so I left. Within days he was back with her, which proved to me that he had not really let go of that relationship. He broke it off with her and begged me to come back a third time and go to counseling- I said no. I decided that I was going to call the shots for me and my children and stop being jerked around on every whim of my husband's. It is hard but so is suffering through a dead marriage.

by april8112 28 Posts
Posted on 9/30/2009 5:54 PM

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by april8112 28 Posts
Posted on 9/30/2009 5:54 PM

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He broke your trust- promised he would not talk to this person anymore but continued. Sorry - he will do it again. That is MY vote..go ahead and file!

by mtnvly 3539 Posts
Posted on 9/30/2009 4:33 PM

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If he really doesn't want you to file, I would insist on marraige counseling and a number of conditions-one of which would include a new job.

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I feel guilty about not brining up my children in a 2 parent home, too. It is hard to give up the dreams you had for yourself and your family. The good news is that you have an opportunity to rebuild the life you wanted and maybe even find a partner who really shares your dreams.

by mynewday 47 Posts
Posted on 9/30/2009 12:15 PM

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