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What do I do?

I caught my husband cheating with a woman he found on Match.com...read the text messages that they sent to each other over the past month-he saved them because he wanted me to find them. I love my husband, but not what he did and have a hard time seeing past that...not seeing "the other woman" in his eyes when he looks at me. Two days ago, he wanted a divorce so that he could find what he is looking for...apparantly she has since broken it off with him because he told her that he was already divorced. We spoke on the phone last night and discussed what went wrong in our marriage-what should have been done if we wanted it to work. He just called and now he wants to talk and try to work things out; ;which means that he wants to come back home while we work on things. I don't know which way to go. Do I stay with a man who decided to break the promises that we made to each other when we got married, or do I start a new chapter in my life without him? I need to also mention that in our 5 year marriage, we produced a beautiful child who is now three years old, and did not ask for any of this.

by JHL 24 Posts
Posted on 3/17/2008 10:25 AM

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Cast your vote

Stay and work things out for the sake of the child.
Separate and work things out while living apart.
Work things out while still living in the same home.
Go ahead with a divorce and move on.
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Comments for "divorce360.com | What do I do?" (3) (You must be logged in to answer)

Go to www.ischeatingamentaldisorder.com -check it out-it can give you a very different prospective on things.
I think you should stay and try to work things out-time apart would make you drift away from each other even more.
To separate is a very unreasonable thing to do-communication is your key to success. Have your husband to look at this web-site -he might be surprised to learn a few things about himself.

by believer001 4 Posts
Posted on 3/23/2008 6:48 PM

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"... beautiful child..." - Tomorrow should be an eventful day for the two of you. Have a wonderful Easter...

by bp 1241 Posts
Posted on 3/22/2008 11:36 PM

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I would suggest time apart with no contact for awhile, this will give you some time to think of what you want and need to do at this point.

Counseling for yourself may help.

Your husband is the one who broke the marriage vowels, not you. It is his responsibility to regain your trust, that does not happen over night. If you should continue the marriage, couples counseling is almost a must.

No one is perfect, we all have our flaws, but for a marriage to work there must be honesty, faithfulness, trust and open communication from both sides. Each of us have our own needs. Relationships are hard work, they don't just happen, but it takes 2. Sometimes a marriage is repairable, sometimes not.

Before you let him come back ask yourself if you can really forgive him for the hurt he has caused, be very honest with yourself. Trust that you will make the decision which is right for you. Good luck.

by starr1 187 Posts
Posted on 3/18/2008 11:50 AM

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