divorce360.com provides help, advice and community for people
contemplating, going through or recovering from divorce and the issues around it,
including separation, divorce laws, spousal support and emotional issues.

Community  :: dactyl's Stuff  :: dactyl's Blog

  click here 
Personal Tags

Find divorce professionals in your area

Find lawyers
Find financial professionals
Find coaches
You can search for Blogs by tag here:

Invite Others
Invite friends and family to join you on d360! - Click here

The Greatest Love of All 

     I'm not the biggest Whitney Houston fan, but, after her death, the radio stations were going crazy playing her music.  As we were painting the upstairs, the song "The Greatest Love of All" was playing.  I started listening to the words while I was singing along and it hit me how true this song is.  

     The greatest love of all IS inside of each of us.  No one will ever love us the way we love ourselves.  Even one of the greatest commands says that we should love our neighbors like we love ourselves.  Well, if you don't love yourself very much, how can you love someone else?  It's why if we don't feel we are very lovable, we will allow others to abuse us in some way.  Oh, I did it myself.  I allowed my ex to try and remold me into someone he could like better.  I know better now.  

     We also need to teach our children that they should love themselves above others.  No, that doesn't mean that they should be conceited.  It means that they should have enough love and respect for themselves to not settle just because something better will not come along.  It means that they should know that they are worthy.  And, you should know you are, too.

     It sounds counter intuitive to love ourselves the most.  But, if we don't, who will?  

by Dactyl  5834 Posts 

Posted on 2/18/2012 7:19 PM
Get AlertsGet Alerts!
Sent to Friendsend to friend

Tags: love , respect
<< Previous Post  |  Blog posts by Dactyl  |  Next Post >>

Comments for "The Greatest Love of All"  (7) (You must be logged in to answer)

I was not aware about those things about the song.  I still think the song holds true- we have to learn to love ourselves before we can love others.
by Dactyl   5834 Posts
Posted on 2/19/2012 7:25 PM

A couple of things you probably did not know about the song. First, it was written with Muhammad Ali in mind and the song was used in his 1977 biopic. My Dad was a big Ali fan and I remember seeing the movie and the song was originally recorded by George Benson (who I am a big fan of) and I strongly feel his version is a more sincere version. But I digress, I thought Whitney Houston was a hypocrite for singing and making this song popular and yet living the lifestyle that she did. It's not just about learning to love yourself, but also to respect yourself (something I believe today's youth is lacking).
by Rick900572   551 Posts
Posted on 2/19/2012 7:19 PM

I'm firmly convinced that people who are self-worshipping actually hate themselves...
by Dactyl   5834 Posts
Posted on 2/19/2012 6:04 PM

I agree.  We should not rely on others to make us feel loved and worthy.  That power should be within ourselves.  Through divorce I am learning that love and respect for yourself will make you a better partner, parent and person.   There is a time to put others first.  However, it became a habit with me and it I lost a lot of respect.   Not only from my spouse and others but I lost respect for myself, as well.  No worries though, my increasing independance is bringing it back threefold.
by haboo   1075 Posts
Posted on 2/18/2012 8:12 PM

All I can tell you is life does get better....after 28 years I am in a better place with a man I love...never give up ....IT  GET DOES GET BETTER...HUGS TO YOU!!!
by Joyful   2705 Posts
Posted on 2/18/2012 7:56 PM

Yes, we need to teach self-love.  Let's not confuse it with self-worship, however.  Then we would all end up like my ex.
by Iam   7316 Posts
Posted on 2/18/2012 7:45 PM

Very, very true. In answer to your question, no one will love us, because I have firmly come to believe, we as individuals will never be capable of having a successful relationship with anyone else, until we are successful with ourselves. Ex wrote me a novel of an email recently, and the quote that got me the most was "In the darkest time of my life, and he (our 11y old son) isn't there for me." For the record 11 year old isn't anywhere close to mature enough to understand the "dark place" ex is in, and yet that is where he expects to get support? And he also shares with me that he is "having relationship problems that he will not discuss with me." I am like REALLY?!?!? Seriously?!?!?! I am so SHOCKED!!! I can see that V still has not managed to look himself in the mirror and deal with himself and his unhappiness with life. Sadly, until he does he will continue to go through life sucking the souls of everyone who has ever wanted to love him dry. Fortunately, I am trying very hard to teach my son exactly what you are saying here. We are responsible for our own happiness. No one else can make us happy. It is not our place to make anyone else happy-ever.
by Assina1   679 Posts
Posted on 2/18/2012 7:44 PM

Divorce360.com is not a substitute for advice from a lawyer, accountant, financial planner, therapist or other professional to obtain advice. Divorce360.com is not intended to, and should not, take the place of professional advice. The opinions expressed in the divorce360.com message boards are those of the author and the author alone. Divorce360.com does not endorse any specific product or service.

expand information center
divorce360.com's ecards
divorce focused content ::
divorce most popular ::
1. 14 Real Life Ways To Save Money
Do Divorce And Money Mix?

2. You Just Found Out They Cheated, Now What?
8 Things You May Not Know About Cheating

3. African-Americans and Marriage
African-Americans are Less Likely to Marry and More Likely to Divorce, Studies Show

4. Don't Get Even...Get Mad
Yes, Anger Can Save Your Relationship. Here's How.

5. Divorce = $100,000
Love is Grand, but When It's Gone, Divorce Can Cost More Than Twenty Grand