Me and my BIG mouth.... 

Oh boy...! Girl, don't do it again no matter how bad you want too... Let the lawyers handle it, don't talk to him at all...

That's what I've had to do because at first I was saying this and that because I was so pissed. But now, I don't talk, email, txt or anything to the stbx...

LOL keep your fingers to yourself...=0)

LOL stay strong...!!!

lol - I did say WORST case scenario here...

but did I scare you enough to keep your yam shut from here on out?

Thx, Carlly - I just read that you go home and punch the hell out of your son and I was like what!! Then I finished the sentence, haha..your son's punching bag! 

Spaz - You're scaring me a little but I have a lot of confidence in my case.  I can show where the contracted company made deposits on company's behalf, etc.  (He's not too smart...bank statements still come here).  I was an auditor and an accountant so I kept pretty tight records too.

In a nutshell, they (the judge) would have to be as blind as Stevie Wonder not to see thru his bulls**t!

given enough time people have been known to find a way to explain every financial mis-step to the satisfaction of the court....

 

I don't know if you can truly prove where he got the money to buy the things he did - and if he, or someone else, is clever enough, proof can somehow magically appear that shows the marital/business funds going somewhere else....in a nutshell your frustration and leak of what you know, worst case scenario, could have seriously screwed you.

Let's hope he, or someone he knows - isn't that smart.

I go home somedays and punch the "hell" out of my son's boxing bag.  Cardio kickboxing is great too.  Just imagining kicking my STBX helps let out the frustration and anger.

I've also beome a "Player" when it comes to darts!!!

Crazy, I know but hey, you do what works.  Your sense of humor will get you through.  Take it easy on yourself and document, document, document....

I go home somedays and punch the "hell" out of my son's boxing bag.  Cardio kickboxing is great too.  Just imagining kicking my STBX helps let out the frustration and anger.

I've also beome a "Player" when it comes to darts!!!

Crazy, I know but hey, you do what works.  Your sense of humor will get you through.  Take it easy on yourself and document, document, document....

Thanks for the words.  Onestepcloser - I, like Flutters, only have posted truth.  I didn't care about putting my pic on because of that.  When I found out that after we split he met and had a gf I didn't post about it because I didn't want him to know that I knew until I had proof of adultery as we were still legally married.  Now that it is stated in the papers he rec'd I don't care about referencing that either.  If they tried to use any of my blogs as a defense, they'd be hurting themselves, ha!

Spaz - even if he transfers titles, wouldn't he have to explain where that money went?  He's not supposed to sell anything and if he gave it as a 'gift', wouldn't he then have to give me half of what he initially spent for it?  Misappropriation of company funds...

How's that hole in your foot feeling today?

My concern is by the time you get to court now, absolutely everything is going to be in someone else's name...

 

sigh - what's done is done...

 

btw - you can't take him to small claims until after your divorce is final - the truck is still very uch marital property and is in play until the divorce is final - you can demand it back, and his requirement to honor that note needs to be addressed in your settlement. You shouldn't have let it go without being paid....

LIP, we have all been there, done that.  It's how you handle the situation now that matters.

I love the posting on the refrigerator thing.  I need to put stuff like that all over my house, my office, etc.

I like how you said in your poker hand you had a pair, well the first thing I thought of was:  you have a pair, but he's never had a pair of....if you know what I'm referring to.  LOL 

 

You stay strong.  I don't think you gave anything overly pertinent away.  The 4 wheeler, maybe, but finding where someone lives is so easy with the internet these days.

 

As far as what onestepcloser said, I know that's true but I haven't said anything in my posting that isn't true.  My stbx once blamed me for airing his dirty laundry.  That is somewhat true but it is MY dirty laundry as well and I can't help the fact that the man has a sex addiction, who cheated on me, who is co-habitating with another woman while he is still married happens to be him.  I have every right to discuss my life and my situation with whomever I choose.  If he doesn't want people to think he's a bad person then he shouldn't do bad things.  My opinion.

Hang in there chick.  Email me or call me if you're tempted to email the a**hole.  : )

Hi, I am going thru a separation myself, when mad or pushed by circumstances I have a tendency to fire away with information that is best known by me. 
 I have done exactly what you have done by sending an email out with what you know.  I have learned that email is handy in getting them to admit the truth, which you did.  
To get the truth you gave him your hidden information, and he in turn reacted to you knowing, your advantage.  NOW, you have what you need to do, so sit and wait.  
 I want to mention something, I am not sure it is true but, I read some where about using blog sites as a defense, meaning what was posted was used against the person posting.  I am very leery now on what I say.  Also is that your picture, if it is, I think it is a dead give away if he knows you are posting.  I say be very careful.....

my last two contacts with my stbx, i made sure i was cordial, as i could be... even though we all know i have been a wreck this week.  i have been keeping my cool up front.  good poker.  tomorrow she is supposed to sign the papers i had written up.  that is if the lying adultress whore keeps her word.
 i have written angry emails in the past.  they usually don't do anything but frustrate me more.  then i found this place.  my brothers and sisters in arms.  oddly enough, her middle son called me earlier this evening, he is the one i was able to save.  he is going threw a divorce as well, and values our relationship.  as i was giving him advice, i realized how much i was telling him that i my self needed to follow.
earlier i was contemplating turning my van into a billboard to tell the whole town what a whore she is...  that has passed now.  right after i told him, not to give his stbx's attorney any help.  same goes here.  don't help him hurt you more.  save it for court where the judge can nail him in the groin.

you just kill me. your adivce to all of us is always so on the mark and supportive.  but then you are so hard on yourself. can you take him to small claims court yourself (i know 7K is not small) but maybe get interest on the time over 5 days or make him return the truck to you. i would interpret that email as him admitting to signing that promisary note know ing he wasn't going to fulfill it, intent to defraud i think. ask spaz.
and smile because i bet he felt his first shutter of fear at your intelligence and realizing his top of the world days are almost over.

You guys are making me laugh, thanks!  Between stcheshirecat's "kicking him in his fat belly" and betrayed's response, I was cracking up. 

Well, I feel a little better.  Maybe my mouth (or fingers rather) didn't screw my case up too terribly bad..thank you all.

My sword is ready my lady, let us proceed to battle.

I know.  It's so hard.  I was advised to keep it from my ex that I knew he was cheating.  He hadn't moved out, yet so it was hard to keep from kicking him right in his fat stomach.  One night, he was being arrogant and pompous and self-righteous, and I just couldn't help it:  I said, "And, I suppose you're not cheating."  He looked shocked and indignant and lied straightfaced, until I mentioned his f-buddy by name.  Then he looked even more shocked that I was able to figure it out. 

What's done is done.  I think in the long run, it won't make a bit of difference.  He probably still deludes himself that he may know...but you don't really KNOW!

I know exactly how frustrated you feel....it's so hard not to tell the stbxh that you know exactly what's going on...esp when it comes to money.

That is why I do not speak or email my stbxh anymore....too tempting to let him have both barrels!!! I limit my contact to short replies to his infrequent text messages.Can't get much shorter than "k" or "no"!! LOL

Chalk what you did up to a momentary lapse of judgement...but keep that "ace in the hole" for when you really need it!!!

Sound like you have it under control, and even relaxed enough to chuckle.  Good for you.  You are going to do great, he obviously doesn't know what he is facing in the not too distant future.  Hang in there we all have bad days and do things we wish we could take back, usually a nanosecond after hitting the send button.

Thanks guys, yeah I showed him my hand so now he knows I got a full house...NO,  actually I only showed him a pair...little does he know I got a 3 of a kind to go with it!! (poker players w/get that).

Jamesalone - you did make me chuckle about the copies.  I was like "file, already did..attorney, already did... refrigerator?!"  haha...thanks...I guess I should..    I may not be Italian but I do have a shotgun mouth...

Print the email reply, make several copies.  One for your file, one for your attorney and one to post on the refrigerator to remind yourself not to do that again.  The frustration and general feeling of helplessness gets to all all of us.  You are not the first and certainly will not be the last to tip their hand.  With the truth on your side you will be fine.  It's the liars that have to worry that they may forget crucial parts of their stories.  Be well.

I loved the Italian part Kitty...shameee on me for that too... lol

What's done is done now, but try not to tip your hand to him.  Knowledge is power.  He doesn't need to know what you have on him.  Sometimes it's better to say nothing.  I know it's hard.  I'm Italian.  Nuff said.

Where do all these comments come from?   You seem to pinch a nerve everytime you blog!  

You couldn't help it, so don't worry about it as you are only human.   Who cares what he thinks or knows, just do your best in the preparation process now, and get as much as you can from the marriage.    Just relax as you have a while to wait.   You will survive.

It seems both of us would like to get even with a couple people out there.......hhmmmmmmmmmmmm!
You are is a difficult situation, but you are a tough girl and we know you can go the extra round.   Hugs

Most of us have done the same or similar. Don't beat  yourself up. On the bright side, maybe he now realizes he shouldn't mess with you. He might just be more prepared but there's no use looking at the downside.

Hi Huuun!

well... I have a big mouth too... and my mom makes her part always saying ¨U CANT BE SOO HONEST!¨lol buut anyway... it can go both ways, either will will crap him self, most liers cannot handle the true when it just gets out there, ooor he does can get mad... and freak out, so try to fly low, if he asks where did u get the info play it cool, just random gossip... some men are innner soldiers and if they feel they NEED TO WIN the will fight to death... so play it cool!

goood luck!

I guess I just felt like I wasn't getting any results any where so I damn sure wasn't gonna get any in court.  I may have jumped the gun, and Curious, you're right, he now can figure a story out on the 4-whlr.     I want Judge Judy!!!!  She'd set his ass straight!