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When do you just say get the hell out????? 

well yesterday my ex came to drop off my son and started to talk to my oldest daughter. they were talking about school and her car. her car has some issues and like everyone else it takes money to fix. i had already put about 700.00 to fix it up. but there are some other things that need to be done.. so my ex was talking to my daughter about her car and school. she called me outside to talk to her and he started telling me that i have to fix her car and i told him that he needs to give some money to help. he of course said no that he gives me enough money to fix the car.. lol.. what a jerk. then he started to raise his voice in my front yard. i told him not to start with me especially here in my yard. well he would not shut up. so i said to get the hell out of you yard. i will never let him back here again. he started with his shit about money, and he wanted my daughter to move with him. yeah right. he better think twice if he thinks she will go.. no way.

so i guess i am still learning that he will never change.. but only that his wife is not here , he has the balls to say something. if she is here his wife has all the balls.. thats a joke.. so i guess i better learn to be stronger and stand my ground with him..  i should have known better that he would not even offer to help his daughter to do a tune up on the car... what a joke..

 

thanks

just needed to vent a bit..

 

cherbear

by cherbear  5182 Posts 

Posted on 8/13/2009 9:00 PM
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Tags: stupid ex , kids , cars.school..
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Comments for "When do you just say get the hell out?????"  (18) (You must be logged in to answer)




psycho,
thankyou so much.. sometimes i need to hear what other people are going through too. i cant stand even looking at my ex.. he is such an ass.. all talk no action these days. especially when it comes to his kids.. he is cheap.. but thanks fo the comment. every little bit helps believe me..

cherbear
by cherbear   5182 Posts
Posted on 8/20/2009 1:00 AM
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Hi Cherbear,

I think the reason why they need to be seen by you (me) is because he knows that you don't give a "bleep"  about him.  So in order for you to notice him or get your attention they invade your enviornment and space.  My jackass, continues to walk in and out of my home and that's sadistic!  Not to mention, I've asked him to stay the "bleep" away from me, my children, my home!  He just doesnt get it but I do!  Hang in there!
by psycho   61 Posts
Posted on 8/19/2009 11:02 PM
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I believe spaz just gave some good advice I plan to remembering that would work wonders...
Trouble is my stbx wouldn't really care he would dare me too...

I hope things start getting better with you...

Love...
by Lovemeknot   240 Posts
Posted on 8/19/2009 4:59 PM
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spaz,

thank you and i will do that the next time. i was thinking to inconvenience myself and tell him not to come to my house to pick up  the kids or drop them off, but why should i have to do that. i will next time tell him just what you said to do.. he is always crossing the line with me. i  can see my daughter letting him starting to control her too. i dont want that to happen..

THANK YOU
sherry
by cherbear   5182 Posts
Posted on 8/19/2009 4:51 PM
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cher - always have your cell phone on you - the SECOND he starts to get out of line if he is at your home - you whip it out and dial 9-1...then you look at him and say....do I dial the last "1" or are you going to shut the hell up and leave? Your choice...

You HAVE to stand up to him, ESPECIALLY in front of your kids - or do you want to teach, by example, that it is okay for someone to treat you the way he does?
by spaznskitz   7745 Posts
Posted on 8/19/2009 4:46 PM
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psycho, i agree with you totally.. why do they even need to be noticed.. especially by me.. let his wife notice him and hear him not me.. i dont even want to hear is voice. it makes me sick..thanks for the comment'
by cherbear   5182 Posts
Posted on 8/19/2009 4:31 PM
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I dont understand why they feel it necessary for you to see or hear them!  What's with that!  Arrrgh
by psycho   61 Posts
Posted on 8/19/2009 1:08 PM
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hereigo, you are so right. i have to stop getting angry. i have to stop letting him see me angry too. and i do think he is still angry for the divorce, but that is 7 years ago. dont you think he will let it go already???.

kev,
pretty sad that he wont help his kid.. especially that its his daughter. he is a cheap father and his daughter knows it too. so i have learned alot from all of my friends here.

thank you guys

HUGS

cherbear
by cherbear   5182 Posts
Posted on 8/16/2009 7:41 PM
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It sounds like he's angry with you for divorcing him.

The fact that he doesn't speak to you that way in front of his wife tells you two things:

1.  He knows what he's saying isn't right.
2.  He's afraid revealing himself to his wife.

Do you even realize how much power you have?  Once you quit getting angry, you win.  Think about it and see if this isn't true.  Then enjoy.....
by HereIgo   756 Posts
Posted on 8/16/2009 2:27 PM
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I don't understand what it means to have balls??   (joke)  You have acted properly by engaging him.   But next time donot get angry or swear.   Because people loose their tempers from seeing you keep yours.   It's a great form of revenge.   If it were my kid I would fix the car and pay for it.   He is not taking responsibility for a matter of safety with his own daughter.   Unbelievable.............I thought Purg would be a tough one to fight with (mind you she is no match for me)  but I think your pretty tough too!!
by kevinwo   733 Posts
Posted on 8/14/2009 6:59 PM
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Cher, I NEVER stood up to my ex until he moved out.  I was liberated somehow!  Now I pretty much tell him what I think when I think it.....I always preface it with "I'll use small words so you can understand".

The trick for me was to realize that I am worth so much more than he made me think I was.  Next time he has you cornered in the back yard, tell him that if he wishes to discuss the matter further, he can call you.............then walk back into the house.  I guarantee that the more you stand up to him, the less he will try to put you in your 'supposed' place.  Men like that are afraid of strong women.  They demoralize women to make them selves look bigger.  Don't give him the chance!

You are a strong woman.....I've seen your strength grow over the last year...here and in other forums!  You  look at yourself and tell yourself that you are a woman of worth!
by angielou   1563 Posts
Posted on 8/14/2009 2:36 AM
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You do need to stand up to him. Don't ask me how, I'm a doormat LOL. I think lip might be right. I'm glad you told him to leave. He shouldn't ever bee allowed to treat you badly.
by bluebird   1157 Posts
Posted on 8/13/2009 10:59 PM
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lip, he does try to contol me and i let him do it.. i did tell him to leave my house. all he does is put me down. i am sick of him doing that.i know i have to stand up to him too. the funny thing is he is like a midget.. he is tiny but he has always intimidated me. dont know why either. i could prob just step on him..lol..
by cherbear   5182 Posts
Posted on 8/13/2009 9:44 PM
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You NEED to stand up to him.  I don't mean go down to his level and yell.  I mean if he comes to your house, hell if he sees you at the store, he is not allowed to speak to you in any other way other than to be cordial.  If he starts acting a fool, tell your kids to get in the house and shut the door on him.  If you see him in public and he disrespects you just look at him like he's some nut stranger you've never met, speaking a foreign language and turn and walk away.    

((hugs))   don't let him control you for another second.
by lifeinpurgatory   1830 Posts
Posted on 8/13/2009 9:40 PM
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I'm sorry he continues to try control and does not want to help.I'm learning the hard way that some people just never change.
by sjg   1766 Posts
Posted on 8/13/2009 9:27 PM
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It's a shame that he acts like that Cher.  You don't need it, and your kids certainly don't either.

Hugs.
by Kitty7470   2620 Posts
Posted on 8/13/2009 9:11 PM
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well i had my kids there and its hard for me to stand up to this ass.. i hate him.. omg.. you just cant know how much..
by cherbear   5182 Posts
Posted on 8/13/2009 9:11 PM
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Good for you!!! If it was me I would have turned around and went into the house and left his dumbazz outside with himself.!!!!
by M   142 Posts
Posted on 8/13/2009 9:03 PM
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