Dating; Why are there so many negative people out there?  

I can guarantee a relationship with the right woman.  I would never sleep with a stranger ever.  First, know the mind, thoughts and goals.  Sex is a tiny part of a relationship but it is wholesome.  I think you are in the wrong places to find these guys.  There are guys like me, it may take a long time to get to know and love a person.  Sex is to important to treat as casual.  There is so much more to a relationship than sex.  Our generation has made sex into something worthless, when it is the most special gift to give the one, one loves.  You keep looking and remember, success is never a result, it's a goal.

Sorry, but I just have to say this. A woman gives sex to get love? Please. We don't live in the dark ages. That's just plain stupid. Women like sex too. We just happen to have brains and know that meaningless sex is just that - meaningless. Besides, a man who gives love to get sex is just a different type of whore.

There are good men out there.   But i think men and women think quite differently.   I've heard the following quote :

A woman gives sex to get love. 
A man gives love to get sex.

I think this may be accurate but i would say that men want love just as much as women but the sex may be important precursor to judge how happy they will be if the relationship goes longer term. 

But I don't think a woman should just give sex away easily.  Making a partner wait builds up respect.  
I'd also say a good smart man would make a woman wait for sex too.    There is some fun in that game.    

I've dated so many men I created a spread sheet to keep them straight :). Sad, but true, and I'm a little obsessive.

This is what I think I know:
1. Men actually do want love, too.
2. Men, for the most part, don't think about relationships AT ALL and are fairly clueless as to how to go about getting it.
3. When they see a woman they like, their thoughts turn immediately to sex. They can't figure out that to get what they want they have to wait for it.
4. They push, you give in, they then feel that they got what they wanted so are done. It's stupid, but it comes from a place of ignorance.
5. I say no. It doesn't make a damn bit of difference what they say. Practice. It's fun, it gives you power, and unfortunately, it's necessary.
6. I have had 2 boyfriends. I made both of them wait and beg. It works. I broke up with the first one but he still calls. I keep breaking up with this one but he keeps coming back. 
7. Men, in our riduculous society, are the ones who ask. You control the relationship. Take charge.
8. I have found boyfriends. I have dated a lot. I still don't have love and wonder if I'm ever going to find it, too. However, I do know how to control the relationship so that when the right one comes along I hope I won't make those same mistakes.
9. An ass who tells you there are no guarantees should be dropped immediately. This is why you spend time getting to know him.
10. I am a bad person to listen to since I'm getting divorced and clearly don't know as much about relationships as I wish I did.

Its the time when I was dating this one guy for like 4 weeks or so and I asked him if we were going to be serious if he was going to be monogamous....long pause and next sentence was..there are no guarantees.  The first man that told me that was my ex...i asked after he said he was going to be good and he was sorry and he was choosing me, if I could believe in him and he said there are no guarantees in life.  I replied to both of them that I am not interested in the offer.

I was telling them that I prefer to date for while before having sex.  They said that even if I waited to have sex is not a guarantee that the relationship will work out in the long run...so why wait.  It was their way of cajoling me into having sex with them right away.  I find it disrespectful.

I have been on my own for 5 years now and I have a very good career and do well for myself and my daughter.  I am not really looking at the wrong places I dont think, cafes, pof, match, and eharmony is last tried, I even met a guy in church...but he turned out to be Married!!!  My next door neighbor hit on me, but he lives in a house with 4 other gay men and he is straight?!  

Its been quite depressing for someone to have everything in life they want except the love of a wonderful man.  I'm quite comfortable in my singlehood but refuse to think that LOVE will never find me again.  Its not that I deserve love...I believe I NEED LOVE.  I dont want to be alone just because my exhusband decided to have several women on the side and I had to divorce him.  I spent so many years not getting the love i should have had...i think ive suffered alone for a long time now...what does one do when one is so lonely?

You find the right guy and you will have guarantees in life.  There are guys like this out there, perhaps you are looking too hard or you are looking in the wrong places.  Just look after yourself for a time.  Your health, wealth, your overall well-being.  They will find you.

Ahhhh dating.....I tried them all, the POF, Match and even Singlesnet.  The best one...eharmony.com.

I had fun with the others but the serious ones are on that site. The process is long and drawn out.  

There are guys that do want something serious and not a casual thing.   Many of the guys that I had coffee mentioned this to me.  They are out there,...I promise. Stay away from the negative ones.

I met just one guy on that site that referred to his ex as a b*&^%, hmmm, I finally told him that maybe she was but to refrain from calling her that in front of me. He was a nice guy but my heart was not there. 

I loved the site, I met nothing but quality, even foul mouthed angle face :-)

I met a very, very nice guy.  We keep joking that we are going to audition for the commericals. So if you see me there then you will know :-)

Best of luck.

1st they shouldnt act like that .the perople beingsaying are
being rude i think guys these days arnt respectful a good relationship takes time

1st they shouldnt act like that .the perople beingsaying are
being rude i think guys these days arnt respectful a good relationship takes time

I wondered the same about "no guarantees in life" What are you asking them. I am just now beginning to think about dating. I have not been in a hurry and just want casual friends.

What question are they answering to when they say "no guarantees in life"?    I got your blog, I just didn't quite understand that part.