So, this is my life???? Vent! 

So, this is it? 
This is my life?

What the hell happened?When did this happen?
I keep waiting to wake up...hoping, wishing that this is all just a bad nightmare and Im dreaming.
This cant be it.I just cant believe it.

It hurts to view all my Facebook friends profiles. Im happy for them...but why did my family have to fall apart? 
So many other families...they all look so happy.  
Im having a pity party - the guest of honor today. It will be short lived, but Im allowed to wallow once in awhile. 

I am so mad right now. 
Who can I blame?
I blame him - thats for sure.But, I cant stay angry because its too draining.


But, why? I dont understand why this all had to get so out of control??!


I suppose I had a fantasy - that we would split but still be able to remain friends for the sake of our son.

I dont feel any "friend" vibe coming from him. Nope. He's not the kind of person I would want as a friend....so why did I marry him???
Who is he? I have no clue who this man is.....and what he is capable of.

So, how am I supposed to spend the next 18-21 years parenting with him????? 


How is this fair to my baby?? To me??

Im just so mad - because I feel that the one to really be hurt in the end is barely old enough right now to realize what the hell has been going on around him for the past 8 months of his young life.
My teenager doesnt need this crap. He's got his own stuff to worry about.  Yet, he's worried about mom bc the STBX turned out to be out of control...now there's an OP. Phewww....


I am just really really ashamed, disgusted and disappointed in the way things have turned out for my family. I feel like we belong on Jerry Springer. 

I am really disappointed in him and in the path of destruction that he caused us to get us here.
Im super mad because he doesnt seem to get it and he doesnt seem to care!!!!
I would say that I wish I never met him. But thats not true. If I had never met him, I would not have my baby...who helps make it all worth while.