Divorcing a narcissist 

LOL no problem I have posted twice before also. It is strange how you can predict their actions. My therapist told me almost down to the exact words what my STBex would do at our meeting. I told my attorney, she was amazed how my therapist could call his behavior.

We become the invisible exwives.

I'm schitzoid!  See even my two personalities agree on the a-hole!!

Actually, I posted my comment and I SWEAR it wasn't there!!  (I was also on 2 other sites so thought I deleted it).  So I tried to remember what I wrote and did it again, hahha!!!  Sorry!

Yes, same with me!  I was his obsession (trying to subpoena an almost $20k phone bill now), his property (he demanded me to not work, disconnect from friends/family), then as soon as he know he wouldn't be able to control me,  POOF!  Bank accts, checks, completely left with zero.  Oh, a maxed out credit card and no savings.   Once he knew for sure that I was seeking a legal way out POOF!    As if I never existed.  Crazy, huh?!!!

I knew exactly how he'd do it, even told him.  Of course it was

Yep.  Exactly as my case.  I went from being his obsession (I'm trying to get a almost $20k phone bill subpoenaed) and yes, I was like property (demanded me not to work, distanced me from everyone) to poof!  As if I never existed.  Overnight.  Once he knew I was seriously seeking a divorce and he couldn't sway me not to...POOF!  Crazy, huh?!

My STBex has NPD what a nightmare to divorce. I was told by my therapist and 3 other doctors that when a person has NPD they see their spouse as a belonging. What a nightmare. We no longer talk only through the lawyers. My attorney suggested to me that we set up an email account only for each other and that we check it often. Her reason for this is after the divorce it will become very expensive to go through attorneys. Prayerfully we will have to have little or no contact. My children are grown. Like, lifeinpurgatory once I showed him he could no longer control me that I was no longer afraid of him, I do not exist in his world. That is fine with me I just need to get myself settled into a routine again.
It is a nightmare and I am so sorry for your pain.

Your story sounds so horrifying similar to mine.  I am divorcing a narcosistic, pathological lying, s.o.b. myself.   I can't get into details due to a even more horrific divorce.

You should have it in your divorce orders (well that's too late) but maybe have an order be placed where unless it specifically relates to your child, he is not to contact you.  I emailed mine and told him to not contact me or I would consider it harassment.

Mine was so obsessive, so insanely jealous, so very insecure (it's bad when you get a narcosis that's insecure,
huh?) always falsely accusing me of being a conniving c**t, a f****ing whore, you name it.  Breaking things due to his uncontrollable temper.   And true to my word, he did exactly what I told him he would (I read up a lot during our marriage, one book "Without Conscience" helped me understand the psychopath I was with).  Once he knew he could no longer control me, that I would take the legal route, he turned the page as if I never existed.   Took all the money, got my name off of everything, etc.  and walked into the sunset.  (We don't have kids, thank God).  I guarantee he won't even admit he was married to me to the next victim.

Yes, I too married a stranger.  Read "without conscience" and it may give you a lot of insight.  Take care.