CHERBEAR

DAMN I AM MAD...

As most of your know that i just went through mediation with my ex-husband.. and now i am flat broke.. i have 3 children a house that i cant afford and debt that i cant pay.. i was on facebook and my sister gets on and chats with me crying about losing her job. She asked me if she could move in with me and my kids and i said yes..but today she tells me that she is moving and is not coming to florida where i live. she then goes and says that she might just drive into the water.. what the hell is that... my god thats all she wants is people to feel sorry for her.. then i proceded to tell her that i am thousands of dollars in debt, losing my home with my 3 children.. then she says that atleast i have a job and child support. well when the bills out weigh the income and child support it makes no difference.. is it wrong for me to be angry at my sister who has tried to kill herself 2x.. she just makes me so mad.. look for another job, thats what i would do.. or 2 jobs or 3 jobs. if i have to get 3 jobs to save my house just for my kids..well so be it.. my oldest starts college in august. do we have money No No No.. loans is the only thing to do.. no help from her father so we have to do it alone like every thing else.. the one thing i cant stand is my sister when she cries to everybody in the family. i wont do that..i cant do that. i will figure out what to do.. am i wrong for being upset..?????

by cherbear 5180 Posts

Posted on 6/23/2009 11:06 PM

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Tags: angry , sister , ex-husband , money ,
house , college.job..

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Comments for "DAMN I AM MAD..." (8) (You must be logged in to answer)

You'd think she would offer to move in and give you as much help as possible. If she can't afford to pay rent since she's unemployed, then she could always earn her room by doing housework and such. It might get her mind off her own troubles by keeping her busy and by knowing that she is helping her family.
Also I was wondering, have you tried asking for more child support? I too can't pay my mtg if my husband gives me the amt deemed sufficient by law, so I asked him for more and I got it! Don't know if you've looked into that yet. Good luck

by BlindFaithNoMore 170 Posts
Posted on 6/24/2009 9:20 AM

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No your not wrong being upset, we all feel your pain. And then to have a family member say something like that! Keep hanging in there, if it takes 3 jobs for a while, I know you will do it. Stay strong and keep loving those kids.

by Jamesalone 2720 Posts
Posted on 6/24/2009 9:13 AM

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Shows who has the strength in the family, I would say...You are willing to do what it takes to take care of yourself and your kids...Sounds like your sister is still waiting for someone to come rescue her...Doesn't sound like she has learned those skills or has that inner strength that you have...Hard to believe you were raised in the same household, huh? Of course, it would tend to make you angry...but really, you should just take pride in the fact that you have that inner core of strength that she seems to be missing...Just my thoughts...Hang in there...

by militaryp 2921 Posts
Posted on 6/24/2009 12:03 AM

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No problem, I understand. I become very reclusive when I have personal problems too.

Vent on girl, vent on!

by lifeinpurgatory 1777 Posts
Posted on 6/23/2009 11:53 PM

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lifeinpurgatory, i cant bring myself to call her tonight..i know she wont do it but she just makes me so angry.. i dont tell the whole world my problems and boy do i have them. childsupport or not he does not contribute enough for the kids.. but thats my problem.. i dont tell my family 1/2 of what i am going through.. she has 3 kids too but older. i feel bad for her but i have to think of my family too.. thanks for listening.. i just had to vent ...

by cherbear 5180 Posts
Posted on 6/23/2009 11:30 PM

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No you're not wrong for being upset. It's like some people who know you're going through a lot try to act like they got so much more (drama queen, center stage, whatever you wanna call it).

My cousin's the same way. I never complain to her. She doesn't even know I'm going thru a divorce. The ONE time I complained about my back hurting (pinched nerve), the very same day she was crying to everyone about her back hurting. Pissed me off.

Anyway, the problem w/people threatening suicide is that you have to check on their well-being. Even if it's to call her tonight to make sure she didn't take a drive into the water. She'll appreciate it and then you should explain to her that you are concerned for her but please have a little compassion for you and your situation. Hopefully she will. Best to you.

by lifeinpurgatory 1777 Posts
Posted on 6/23/2009 11:26 PM

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thanks bassett,
she just makes me so mad.. sometimes i hate her for this. feel sorry for me thats all i hear.. damn i am so tired of feeling sorry for everybody.. what about me... gosh..
thanks for listening..

by cherbear 5180 Posts
Posted on 6/23/2009 11:20 PM

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You're not wrong for being upset. You are getting hit harder then her and taking it better in how and what to do. She seems to be dramatizing her issues. She is in a bad spot, but as options like finding another job, even if it's part time and crappy. She should at least balance her emotions with her efforts so it's not so hard for her or others. You do just that. I know this for a fact. You get emotional and get up and make efforts, so can she. No, you're not wrong for being upset. Only concern is she doesn't really try to harm herself. That is the issue more with her right now. Try not to let her reactions cause stress on you. You have way to much already.

by BASSET 1107 Posts
Posted on 6/23/2009 11:16 PM

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