When does being divorced get better? 

When does being divorced get better?  Does it ever feel better?  I get asked those questions all the time.  The best answer to that question is really, "When you decide for it to". People don't tend to like that answer but it is true.  If you want to continue focusing on the negative and going on and on about how rotten your ex was and is, then it is going to continue feeling bad and not get better.  Take any situation...........let's say you got brand new carpet.  It's beautiful and plush, and so wonderful you want to just roll around in it and invite everyone over to see it. Enter two-year old.  She just had red cranberry juice an hour ago.  She gets sick..........all over your new carpet.  You are upset, you are angry, you are saying why me, why now, why that....Think about when do you start feeling better?  You start feeling a little better when you come off of the ceiling and decide to start cleaning it up.  You feel a little bit better when you quit telling everyone about the disaster.  You start feeling better when you come off the ceiling and realize that it was just a bump in the road of life.  And even though you may still have the stain showing up in your carpet from now until you finally get to get new carpet again, you somehow decide to let it go and move on.  It's the same with getting divorce.  As long as you are willing to drone on and on, complain and wine and cry, it is going to feel bad.  But if you can make up your mind to let it go.  Stop thinking about it, or at least attempt to think about something else whenever it starts popping into your mind........you will slowly begin to feel a little relief.  And if you can feel a little bit of relief, eventually you will feel a little more, and eventually you will walk by that stain of an ex of yours and just mutter, oh, how I can't wait to get new carpet again!  Remember.........it's YOU who decides how long you are going to drag yourself through the mud.