Valentine's Day bloody nose 

So, my STBX calls and practically begs to come by on Saturday. He says he has a gift for our daughter and needs to see her. He says he wants to talk about somethings over dinner and will even bring a bottle of my favorite wine as an olive branch. I explain to him that I will discuss the divorce in order to make it as amicable as possible, but this doesn't mean anything (considering it's Valentine's Day).

He brings a card for me as well as some things for our daughter. Great! Well, I notice immediately that he is all butt-sore that I didn't get him anything. To me, that's like calling my ex-husband (as of 2000) on April 16th every year just to wish him a happy anniversary. Weird!

As the day progresses, he is making little back-handed comments about my "decision" and it is starting to wear on me. I tell him if his immaturity continues, he will have to leave.

My sister comes by (her boyfriend was away in Chicago with Obama for the weekend) and notices right away that STBX is drunk.

Long story short, his comments get utterly ridiculous and aggressive, he refuses to leave...I tell him to stay with our daughter (she is asleep for the night) and I will be back later when we both cool down. I walk to the apartment complex next door and chill at my sister's for a bit.

He texts me the entire time. Freaking out that I won't come back. Telling me he is still my husband and we need to spend this day together. I let him go off via text and come home about 12:30 am.

The shit hits the fan. He is gesticulating wildly, he won't back off. I warn him that I will call the police if he keeps it up. I see where this is going and run back to the bedroom where my daughter is sleeping and close the door, just in case. I go to grab the phone and his fear of getting another domestic charge makes him go nuts. He pushes me into a corner and is threatening me.

I push him off of me to run by him and this infuriates him! He grabs my hand and twists my arm around until I am bent over, my back to him. I feel my wrist cracking and realize that in his drunkenness, he might go too far this time. I start to kick back to get him to release my arm. He finally does and I come up with a slap to his face to get away and run to the bedroom to call the cops. He flips me around and bear hugs me around the nose and mouth, I can't breathe! I start to struggle to get away and he begins to ram me into the wall....twice. This busts my nose and blood is all over my face.

He calms immediately at the sight and takes me down unto the floor, in his lap....bawling like a baby. He won't let go and I'm trying to get away. I have never EVER seen or heard him cry in all the years I have known him. Even when our son passed away. I finally struggle free and run to the bedroom where my daughter is, lock the door and wait. I hear him crying in the hall.

My poor baby is awake at this point. She didn't see a thing and is so young, I'm sure she knew we were arguing...she didn't know to what extent. I am pushing back the sobs myself (because I am so scared is all, not because I care that this is over) and feel her little hand rub my back.

"It's okay, Mama. Get the water right there on the nightstand...have a drink.  You'll be alright.

"I know, baby. I'm fine. You don't worry about Mama. Daddy and I just got into a disagreement."

"Mama, my teacher said it's okay to cry sometimes. You only have cried twice. Once in New Orleans when we couldn't find daddy and right now. You can cry if you want to."

Oh God, I am not upset about the incident (I'm just used to it by now). I could even care less that he disrupted the peace that I have started to create in my home again (I can just continue it with a little better defense) but I don't like that my daughter saw me so upset! It breaks my heart that a 6 yr old felt the need to console a 31 year old woman (my b-day was yesterday too).

The thing that really confuses and pisses me off is that he is trying everything to get me back. He is calling all my friends and family trying to get advice to "win" me back. He is bringing me anything he thinks I might want. Offering to pay for expensive tattoos. Basically kissing my butt.

So what would make him think that it would behoove him to come over on Valentine's Day and do this? He had made a reservation for this really expensive fondoo place I love for my b-day and still wants to go to that. Thinks it will be good for me to get out the house. Are you fucking kidding me?!