So....... What the H-E-double-hocky-sticks am I still doing here? 

He refuses to help with the housework.  He makes twice as much money as I do (though contributes less to the household expenses) therefore I'm in charge of running the house, making sure the bills are paid on time, taking the pets to the vet, etc. etc. etc.  Every payday is a race to get the bills paid before he overdraws the account buying himself toys and taking out cash.  What's the cash for?  He either gives me a lame reason that I don't believe or simply refuses to tell me.  It's probably going to the OW. 

So.......  What the H-E-double-hocky-sticks am I still doing here?

I'm saving up to move out.  I'm shopping around for a good lawyer/waiting until the new pre-paid legal benefit from work kicks in (January).  I'm trying to 'prepare' him for my leaving so it won't come as such a shock. i.e. he won't freak out so badly.  I'm waiting for the economy to recover so I won't have to worry about the possibility of getting laid off.  I don't want to do it at a bad time: before/during the holidays, close to one of the kid's birthdays or our anniversary. 

Excuses really.  I have enough money to move (not three months expenses in savings like I want, but enough to move).  My parents have a friend who's a divorce lawyer and would probably work with me on payment.  He won't ever be prepared for me to leave no matter how much I tell him I'm unhappy.  He doesn't listen.  It will never be the 'right' time. 

No.  The reality is that I'm a big chicken.  I'm afraid of facing his reaction.  I'm afraid of living on my own, without a safety net.  Mostly I'm terrified of change.  I've always hated change, even when it turned out for the better. Yep, I'm a great big chicken. 

Okay self:  Time to put on your big girl panties and do what you know you need to do.