It's good to get out again! 

I went out dancing last night.  A few of my neighbors and I headed over to a local bar.  Somehow it just wasn't quite the same as when I was young, pre-marriage!  For one, though they played the same music we all loved, it just wasn't quite as fun.  The people were all a little weathered and worn.  I'm proud to say that on my way out the door one guy came up to me and said I come here all the time and you are the prettiest lady we've seen in here in a long time.  I thanked him and went on. 

 

It made me feel for about thirty seconds like, hey "I've still got it".  The difference is, that feeling lasted thirty seconds.  It is so different to have lived a life, fallen in love, had kids, been divorced, recovered and fallen in love with me.  Though it felt good for those few seconds, I didn't hang on the words like I might have before when I was pre-marriage.  I realized that it felt so good to get out, just because I wanted to, because I felt like being around people, because I felt like dancing.  Before it would have always been about "meeting someone" or about someone else wanting to and me just tagging along. 

 

It feels so good to be on the other side and realize that I do things now just because they bring me joy, and for no other person or reason.