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Is Cohabitation After Divorce The New Trend? 

The US Census Bureau says that cohabitation is up almost 1,000 percent from the sixties.  That's not really shocking.  There was still the stigma of "shacking up" back then.  Now cohabitation is a widely accepted way for couples to be together without marriage.  What is surprising, is a new report from Rutgers, they report cohabitation is up among the divorced.

 

The report says that most people coming out of divorce don't want to remarry.  Many people feel like they were burned by marriage once, and don't want to do it again.  Cohabitation allows them to avoid being lonely, without the legal mire to deal with if things go wrong.

 

Of course there is a downside to cohabitation.  There aren't the financial bonuses provided by the government, not to mention retirement plans and health insurance benefits.  Also because your partner can always bail out, it leaves you always on guard. 

 

Trust is easier given in marriage.  Once it's broken, it's hard to trust again, but it's that trust that allows us to be free in a relationship.

 

Source: www.theolympian.com

by inthenews  754 Posts 

Posted on 8/7/2008 8:35 PM
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Comments for "Is Cohabitation After Divorce The New Trend?"  (2) (You must be logged in to answer)




I take the article to mean living with one's new SO after the breakup, not one's former partner after the divorce is final

That said...

I'm not planning to intertwine my finances with anyone else's ever again; cohabitation could work for me with a few financial ground rules in place. But I don't see how it answers issues of lonliness in the way marriage would, since the relationships are inherently different. In some ways, I could see how it would be more lonely to cohabitate.

Each scenario has things to offer and compromises to accept and it's simply what each of us want for ourselves, there's no bigger question to it than that.
by Natalie   729 Posts
Posted on 8/17/2009 1:20 PM
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I wouldn't do it.  I simply feel it's too dangerous to have no strings, suppressed hatred in one of the parties, and a legal system and society that WILL blame the victim if it's a male.  While the legal system has given bad guys lifetime sexual offender listing, and 10-20 year sentences that are reduced with good behavior, etc.(in other words still maybe not equal punishment) nothing compares there to the almost complete absence of legal deterrent to violence on males.  If "tongue-in-cheek" humor desensitizes or keep afloat bad ideas, regardless, I think it puts the man in all the risk, legally and physically.  Don't stay with someone your not married to, before or after marriage. 
Sorry if I sound far-leaning on this topic, I firmly believe this, at this time in society.  Simply, men don't act invincible and take care of yourselves.
I also lean strongly in support of women on numerous issues, so long as I'm not insulted by them when I'm hurt (a funny phenomenon, this really happens, like wolves attacking an injured animal) and there are no discussions of the joys of injuries to a male genitals.  Kind of hard to hear a woman needs respect and people to (for example) attend her home welcoming party when she speak vile things I was not thinking of, while standing next to me.  The mixed signals of "sweetness" can be downright demoralizing.  Ok that's it, I'm sure you get the idea! :).  I'm hoping this area stops becoming my recent agenda, but the alternative is to suppress confronting disrespect to male victims, because the "acceptable" meanness in society (as long as it's to men) does not seem to stop!  All right, take care, peace to all!
by AlanE   68 Posts
Posted on 8/17/2009 12:49 PM
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