divorce360.com provides help, advice and community for people
contemplating, going through or recovering from divorce and the issues around it,
including separation, divorce laws, spousal support and emotional issues.

profile
Community  :: lori-woodall's Stuff  :: lori-woodall's Blog

  click here 
Personal Tags
ADVERTISING PARTNERS


Blogs
You can search for Blogs by tag here:


Invite Others
Invite friends and family to join you on d360! - Click here

Expectations 

I was talking to my oldest son tonight about his visit home. I usually get a little tense before his visits because he gave me so much trouble when he lived here. Its seems, every time he comes home, my youngest son ends up in trouble. The last visit, he got Bradley drunk and the time before that, he took him to an illegal street race and Brad ended up with a ticket. Steven is a socialite. He doesn't let the grass grow under his feet, but rather, hits the ground running. There are alot of friends around here that I don't approve of. However, my son is 20 TODAY (Happy Birthday Steven), he is in the military, and has lived on his own for 2 years. Anyway, as he is giving me his itinerary for his flight, he proceeds to inform me that his girlfriend will be taking leave at the same time too. She will be about a half and hour from our house. Great, I cant wait to meet her...I'm thinking to myself. Then, he proceeds to tell me he wants his GF to stay with us for a few days. That made me mad. Number one that he would ask knowing that my house will be full to capacity with him here, and Number 2...he sees this girl every day, I thought he was coming home to visit his family?! Am I being selfish? I took a whole week off to spend time with him. He then has the audacity to get mad at me for telling him no. The world has always revolved around him but he needs to know that's not always going to be the case. I don't know why he feels the need to throw a guilt trip on me and I'm not sure how to handle this. Any suggestions?
by Lori-Woodall  923 Posts 

Posted on 7/25/2008 9:22 PM
Get AlertsGet Alerts!
Sent to Friendsend to friend
0

Tags: single mother , kid dilemas
<< Previous Post  |  Blog posts by Lori-Woodall  |  Next Post >>


Comments for "Expectations"  (2) (You must be logged in to answer)




Your home - your rules - you have younger children, they do not need to message that it is ok to shack up with a girlfriend...what he does in his own private space is one thing, but it isn't going to happen in yours.

You are right to put your foot down and if he is butthurt about it - tough.
by spaznskitz   7745 Posts
Posted on 7/26/2008 12:46 AM
0





That's a tough one.  But, you remember how it is to be young and in love, right?  You want to do everything and go everywhere together...ahh...to be young and dumb again.

I know you just want to spend time with just him, but it seems he's included her pretty seriously in his life, and wants to include her with you too.  I would be happy he is introducing you.  You may like this girl, who knows?  I bet she's nervous as hell meeting you for the first time. 

He probably feels some pressure to please everyone at the same time while he's on leave as well.  If he's 20 already, then it's a little late to learn the world doesn't revolve around you.  He will probably always think that to an extent (he's a man, right?)  Good Luck...
by elane   348 Posts
Posted on 7/25/2008 9:33 PM
0







Divorce360.com is not a substitute for advice from a lawyer, accountant, financial planner, therapist or other professional to obtain advice. Divorce360.com is not intended to, and should not, take the place of professional advice. The opinions expressed in the divorce360.com message boards are those of the author and the author alone. Divorce360.com does not endorse any specific product or service.

expand information center
divorce360.com's ecards
divorce focused content ::
divorce most popular ::
1. When Is a Marriage Worth Saving?
10 Things to Think About When Considering Whether to Stick with a Relationship

2. 8 Things No One Ever Tells You about Divorce
Number Three May Surprise You

3. Divorcing? 15 Costly Financial Mistakes
Settlements: 15 Critical Financial Mistakes Often Made in the Heat of Divorce

4. Beginning Checklist: Planning to File for Divorce
12 Steps to Consider if You or Your Partner Have Decided to File for Divorce

5. Are You Ready For Divorce?
Three Key Questions You Must Ask Yourself