Are there men who dont cheat ever? 

I have never cheated on anyone in my life.  this goes all the way back to junior high school when I first started "dating".  It is just not in me to do something so hurtful.  My folks have been married for 53+yrs., and my Dad never cheated.  He has been a good role model.  Yes, I have "checked-out" a woman or two while involved with someone else, but they remained in my mind only and never translated into any sort of contact or action.  Never......not once.

I was married for almost ten years and I never even thought about cheating on my wife loved her unconditionally up until we got separated and i still do.cheating was just not on my mind.A real man or women doe not cheat on the person you love.It take a real selfcentered person to cheat.Before we got married we were together for 2 years.She has been the only woman in my life for a long and i would not ever cheated on her even if she was the last women i was ever going to be with till i died.

after interviewing over 500 men who saw themselves as basically good, but saw cheating as perhaps more like a science experiment, I can tell you that the honorable guys are so rare.  If you find one...hang on for dear life.  How do you tell? Listen to them.  Really listen.  How to they treat people they deal with on a one-time basis?  Are they kind and respectful to waitresses?  Do they lose their cool with other drivers?  Are they quietly supporting their kids and ex's or is it a contest to see how much they can get away with.
Good luck.
Barbara Silkstone ...527 Naked Men & One Woman - The Adventures of a Love Investigator

Yes... some men (real men) don't cheat. I was with my wife 14yrs. Never even came close to cheating. What's the point in cheating?...The real men are out there, just hard to find sometimes. Best of luck with your dating.

I believe most men are afflicted with a giant hole in their foreheads.  It's called the need for female approval.  Some are more addicted than others.  IMO we get that way from having an overly emeshed relationship with our mothers--and conversely we miss the moral compass which comes from an engaged and honorable father. 

Eighty percent or more of marriages are disfunctional--minimally to extreme.  Any guy who needs the conquest of a woman to validate his manhood, is sick.  Plenty of us have been afflicted; have felt the pain it causes and have resolved to live life differently.  Some, maybe many, never will.

We don't get in stressed relationships by accident.  Really healthy people aren't attracted to people with major truth telling and emotional issues. 

If we want to avoid the future pain, we need to take a long hard look at ourselves; our values and our emotional well being.  Maybe we will find our three best friends are me, myself and I.  That's a problem and only begets problems.  Most notably that we likely will end up with our match.

NOT ALL MEN ARE JERKS!

Kids are fun to be with because of the way they think and their out look on life. Try sitting out side and having a conversation about different thing you see and hear and you will be amazed. Nothing feels better than a hug or an I love you from a child when the end of the day comes because they had a great day. Making love is something that you save for the person you want to spend your life with and run out of breath when you think of them. It should happen when you have both come to the decision that you can't be with out each other.

Kiddie, let me acquaint you with Justokguy's First Law of Men...

All men are jerks.  No exceptions.

The First Collolary to Justokguy's First Law of Men:

Some men hide it better than others, but in the end, they're all jerks.

By the way, as to whether men cheat?  If the definition is kept limited to physical infidelity, I would say I'm sure there are a bunch of guys out there who don't and won't for various reasons (some because they're threatened with the removal of private parts by their spouses if they do...)

If the definition of "cheat" is extended, though, to thinking about toher women or having that temptation enter their thougth life or even acting out that desire indirectly (flirting, etc.) I think you have to be in a monastery to find men who can honestly avoid that.  We are such a sex-soaked culture it gets harder and harder not to just "give in" to it.

Just my opinion... keepin it real.

Thanks for your responses, I got to thinking that maybe that is the way dating is NOW.  I agree with that person that said that the "getting to know phase" is important. 

I'm trying to think that at 40 there is more life to be lived and hopefully a new love to be found.  I guess I'm hoping to have a happy love life again. 

My experience out there so far, has left a lot to be desired.  I went on a date with a man who referred to my child as "baggage".  I also went out with several who wanted to get laid on the first date.  Lets not forget Mr. Cell phone. 

Come on GUYS really?!  Cant they do better than this?!

You have to ask yourself "What do I want" You now have the chance to say I want a man to treat with respect and put me and my children first because he loves me. You are in control now and you have the experience from your marriage to say "I will no longer take treatment like that any more" There are men out here that know how to respect women and want the family life style but there is also the man that wants to see how many vulnerable women he can sleep with. Good Luck!

Welcome to dating 2008.

It is not uncommon for people to want to get to know you before choosing to commit to seeing you exclusively. You can't expect someone to automatically let other options go after only being out with you once.

If they are sexually active with several, then sure, there is a red flag and you should run the opposite direction. But if it is casual, and there is just dinner, movies ect - with several people, you might have to put up with it in this day and age.

 

Think about the reality shows about finding a significant other that are so hugely popular (bachelor, bachelorette, farmer wants a wife etc) all of these shows promote dating several at a time to find who you are compatible with for a long term commitment.

You date to figure out what you want in a life partner, you found two things already that are high on your radar - monogomy & courtesy.

Wow, I guess I am going to be in the minority here.  I do think it was really rude for the guy you were on a date with to take other calls while he was out with you.  Unless it is very important or an emergency, I think your cell phone should be ignored on a date.  But as far as dating goes, I don't think it is wrong at all to date multiple people at once as long as you're not flaunting it.  It's kind of like trying on different pairs of shoes to see which fits best.  But without the sleeping around part (unless you like that).  I have always believed that is the point of dating- trying to find "the one".  I think there is a difference between the casual non-serious dating and the player sleep-around-dating.  Just watch for signs that he's a player.  And then once you think you've found mr.right, that's when you have "the talk" to see if he feels the same way and wants to make it exclusive.  Once you are exclusive, neither of you are allowed to date other people.  Always assume they are dating others until you've agreed to become a couple.  You can't be offended that they are dating others when you are not in a committed relationship.   At least that's my take on it. 

Good luck!

I'm surprised you gave him another chance.
I really hope that this is not how dating is now. I don't think it is. when you are on a date your trying to make a good impression, obviously this guy didn't care.  I'm aware that people do this and think that they are just out for a good time and dating multiple people to see who gives them the good time first ( if you know what i mean)
When I do begin to date, (its way too soon for me) I will be hoping to find love again, or should I say "True Love" and hope that the men I date will be looking for the same and respect me enough to give me their undivided attention and date me exclusively. Personally I think that is risky behavior, with all the diseases out there.

I don't think every man cheats.  I also think that those that do generally have an issue that they were too scared to communicate to their partner.  So look for good communicators and you probably won't have that issue.  As far as the dating goes, I'm currently "dating" a couple of men that I've just explained that I'm in the "getting to know you stage" and that we can both date other people, but if it becomes physical that option is out.  So far, it's weeded out the jerks because they don't want a get to know you stage!

In the 20 years(Oct.2008) I have been with my wife and the 4 years I dated her I have never cheated. I am a big believer on the wedding vows but not all men and women are. A man that dates multiple women is a person that wants nothing to do with commitment and is really only looking for a notch in his belt. When dating if you are interested in a person then your focus should be on them and no one else. If that is not the person for you then you end it and if another comes along then thats when you should date again. Always remember you deserve to have a person make you feel special and then return the feeling then the trust between each other will not be a problem.

Of course not every man cheats.  I have never cheated on any woman I have dated (including the one I married and am currently divorcing!!)  To me being faithful is probably the top priority any of the relationships I've been in.  IMO, if you don't like the relationship enough to be faithful, then number one you're pretty shallow as you aren't striving for a deeper connection with the person you're with, and number two, why not just leave.  Why put up the front?  It wouldn't seem worth the time or effort to me.

I think there are plenty of people out there and the rude, inconsiderate people you've met who answer calls and tell you they are dating multiple people, obviously aren't for you. 
Those who answer phone calls and text message at dinner are slobs.  No manners.  Unless they are a doctor, receiving some urgent message, the phone can wait till the end of the date.

And as for dating multiple people.  Personally, i'm a serial monogamist.  I love being with one person and one person at a time.  Though, when you're "playing the field" there isn't anything wrong with casually dating a person here or a person there.  That's how you find out what you want, not simply make excuses for what you get.  But in closing, to tell someone you are casually dating, that "hey, yeah, I'm also seeing lots of other people" is just in poor taste.  There's really no reason to do so, other than to signal to you that they aren't ready to settle down with just you.  It's insulting to a degree and definitely a turn-off imo.  You just aren't coming into contact with the right people.  Good luck to you and keep trying.

No, not every man cheats. The mere thought of it makes me ill. To be honest, I don't think that even after my divorce is finalized, I don't know if I will ever be able to be with another woman because my wife will always have my heart.

I feel for you as i have been there.  my ex cheated on me and it is a horrible feeling.  to build trust up again is difficult.  in regards to the dating game if this man is taking calls basically every time you are out then i would say move on (that is just my opinion).  if you can't give 100% of your attention to the person while on a date then you should not be there.  Yes I agree once in a while you need to take a phone call, but when you have to leave the room and it happens often....it makes you look like you are hiding something and no one wants that feeling.  i have been there and it is horrible to sit there and wonder what the other person is doing when you think or know they are cheating.  I have been lucky though....i found another man in my life who i was able to connect with and trust pretty quickly.  yes at first i was hesitant and he knew that.  he kept reassuring me through his words and actions that "he was not my ex" and that he was "not going to do that to me".  it is hard to put yourself out there, but everyone deserves another shot at true love....so dont sell yourself short.  not every man cheats.  we need to take the risk of being hurt to find love....that is the one thing to keep in mind....but once you find true love it will have been worth it.  in regards to the dating question...about only dating one person at a time.  i too think like you and know i would only date one person at a time.  not everyone is like that until a committment is made.  if you want the one person at a time guy than you need to be upfront with them.....i would not talk about this on the first date of course, but maybe after a few good dates that you think something is there....than bring up the idea of solely dating each other.  just a thought....good luck!