What to do When Your Teen Doesn't Want to Go to the "Other Parent" Anymore?  

My ex and I have always tried to be some united front.  Though at times we fight just as hard as when we were married, most of the time we do a good job parenting together.

So I'd always imagined that there might be a day when my kids didn't want to go to their Dad's.  I also always imagined telling them that they can't play their parents against each other, and that though there are times they'd rather not go, that they would have to.  I'd hoped that if the day ever came that they didn't want to come to one of us that we'd be adult enough to realize that living between two homes is very difficult and that there are other ways to have a relationship with your teen besides having them spend 3 nights a week sleeping under your roof.

But then the unthinkable happened.  My daughter started having struggles with her Dad, and it was her Dad that said he didn't want her to come over anymore.  I don't think she'd ever considered it an option.  He of course rethought his angry words, but now the words are lingering in her mind.  She is continuing to go, but doesn't really want to.  It's hard for me to tell her she must when it was her parent that made the suggestion.  So for now, we tread lightly around the subject. 

But I must say, these turn of events has made me realize that there really does come a time when forcing your child to live between homes is really not in the best interest in your child if they are not thriving by doing so.