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Salute to the Single Parent

Salute to the Single Parent

We are all connected by our divorce experience which helps create our bond and allows us to be there for one another. We have shared our challenges with finances, changing careers, dating, children and learning how to hold it all together without losing our minds.

Life raising children with two parents is challenging. Flying solo doubles our responsibilities and can be unbearably overwhelming at times. You all know the feeling, you just feel like screaming because you just can't take it anymore and you feel like running for the hills. This latest blog is to remind all of those single parents out there- YOU ARE NOT ALONE! I hear you and I feel you because I'm right there with you which creates our connection. In case you don't already know this, WE ARE STRONG AND AMAZING! At times we may get knocked down to our knees, but we get up and face another day for the sake of our children. Even after all the hard work, time and sacrifice, they help keep us going and wind up being our saving grace.

Some of us have the luxury of having our children's' other parent in the picture to share the responsibilities. We do the best we can to "suck it up" and encourage the relationship because we understand the importance of a healthy two parent-child relationship. Others have more of a challenge with an absentee parent who refuses to pay child support or provide emotional support and it's all up to us to hold it together. Whatever the situation is, we adapt to make our new life work and many times surprise ourselves at how capable we have become.

As for our children, they are learning lessons early in life and at times it can be difficult. However, growing up in divorce is not the worst thing that can happen to a child. The environment does have potential to set a child up for finding the negative or positive in life. The feelings and attitudes we have about our own life and situation will trickle down into our little ones' hearts and souls.

"It is not a parent's job to protect their kids from life but to prepare them for it."

                                                                                              -Blake Segal

Everyday we must find a way to forgive our ex as well as ourselves so we can keep moving forward with a positive attitude. It may not always be easy and we can't expect to handle everything on our own. We must find help from our community, friends, family and connect to other divorced parents. Once found, we must not be afraid to ask for help when we need it-even it it's just to talk feelings out. So, during those guaranteed moments of total chaos, take a moment to sit down and breathe. Pay attention to the small miracles you'll find every day when you remember to sit down for some quality time with your children. Pick up the phone or sit down at the computer and connect with a good friend. Every day you have a choice to find the good or bad. Give yourself a break and find the glass half full instead of half empty and remember your children are watching.

"Your children will see what you're all about by what you live rather than what you say."

                                                                       -Dr. Wayne Dyer



For me, I think the good things about being a single parent is coming to realize that I can do it, even if it's not perfect I'm making it work. I also enjoy the extra closeness I feel with my kids, there is this tightness we have that is unspoken that we all just get. Going through my divorce and transitioning into being a single parent was not easy. The following quote helped me and continues to give me strength when I need it:

"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, "I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along." You must do the thing you think you cannot do."

                                                                                         -Eleanor Roosevelt

            Every one of us will struggle at times with the responsibilities of being a single parent. Please share some of your darkest moments and how you found your way back to the lighter side of your self once again. Also, tell me some of the perks of being a single parent. We need to keep reminding one another, we are not alone. That fact in itself provides comfort and hope. I salute all of the single parents out there for all that you do and never forget: YOU ARE AMAZING!

By Amy Botwinick
womenmovingon.com

by divorcediva 168 Posts

Posted on 1/11/2008 3:12 PM

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great information

by Mary 179 Posts
Posted on 1/14/2008 11:17 AM

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Salute to the Single Parent

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