Dealing with Rejection 

Dealing with loss and abandonment seems to be a common theme in my life. I hesitate to call it my karma. But the other morning, as some old feelings were resurfacing again, this landed in my Inbox: "Dumped! - Dealing with Loss and Abandonment."

I've always been a big fan of Elayne Savage, psychotherapist and author, otherwise known as "Queen of Rejection."  And her tips were just the right remedy I needed: Losses come in all shapes and sizes,” Savage writes. Some examples are:

Losing friends
Losing loved ones
Losing pets
Losing jobs
Losing dreams

There are other losses as well:

Loss of support
Loss of respect
Loss of health
Loss of professional identity

“There's a different kind of loss in the sadness we feel in a breakup of a relationship,” says Savage. “All the energy that we put into anticipation of a future with that person is gone – poof. We find ourselves experiencing a huge loss: a loss of what might have been. It leaves a big space in there.”
 
Fortunately Savage offers some ways to put your losses in perspective: <

• Give a voice to your feelings.
• Give yourself permission to be sad or angry (or even relieved.)
• Yes, you can actually speak to and calm the fears of that part of you that is the most upset—that child part of you
• Can visualize a container in which to keep your fears of loss and abandonment? What does it look like?
• Find some creative ways to make your losses real and grieve them.

Tell me: How do you deal with loss or abandonment? Please share.