A friend of mine Len Kingsley recently said to me "To Thine Own Self Be True" means that you stay true to your own frequency regardless of what others may want from you. Since most people do not know themselves very well, total acceptance of another is next to impossible since it is likely that these people do not know themselves and through their own ignorance will project onto you their own unconscious needs, wants, and unfulfilled desires”.
Lately I’ve been thinking about the frequency thing. While I never really understood it until recently when I realized that recently separated individuals are completely off their usual pattern of frequency. All of a sudden their lives as they knew it is completely uprooted and they are in a spin. They survive the best way they know how and it's usually by getting their basic and first human needs met, those that were required as children.
What is it that we all want and need as children; affection, acceptance, friendship, tenderness, security etc. So, it makes sense when we meet someone new (while we are still on different frequency) and they give us what we need, we immediately feel ‘normal’ again.
We feel appreciated, accepted, safe and we begin to equate that with love or something close to that. Eventually, though, if we allow it to happen we return to our normal wave length and the new relationship starts to change and it eventually ends.
So the key is to allow ourselves to return to our ‘normal’ state and to understand our own needs, wants and desires and to find ways to heal our pain before finding a new love relationship and believing that they will heal our pain.
As Len also said, love is a verb. "Don’t tell me you love me, show me that you love me!“ I’m going to change that to say "Don’t say you love yourself, show yourself that you love yourself."
Linda G. Robert M.A., M.Ed., is known as The Solution Lady for personal, self-care, wellness and life solutions. She's worked in the mental health field and education field for several years as well as in law enforcement. Find out more about her at www.lindarobert.ca. Check out her newest booklet at http://www.myarticles.thesolutionlady.com/index.html. 